Where's the Blue Crayon?

A Project Named Desire

2009-06-25T13:39:00.002-04:00

I'm not sure who decided that the Blue household consists of young, upwardly-mobile, wealthy Republicans, but apparently we've gotten on some sort of list. The evidence? Every month we are inundated with magazines like "Housetrends" "Best" and "Cincinnati Gentleman" (now apparently reborn as "Cincinnati Profile"). These slick rags appear as regularly as cicadas in our mailboxes, informing us on such important topics as where to go to purchase a computerized programmable shower system, and the importance of using only synthetic motor oil in one's pricey German vehicles. Since we can't figure out why we get these magazines, or how to stop them, they usually end up in the recycle bin or as craft-fodder for LB. I will occasionally read them with the sense that somehow an intelligence document from the other side has accidentally ended up in my possession. If I am ever in the market for a $5,000 table lamp, now I know where to go! All in all, harmless (if somewhat over-the-top).

But this month's edition of "Cincinnati Profile" published an article that was so terrible that I felt something needed to be said. The headline reads "The Streetcar Debate", which makes one believe that, perhaps, the article will engage in a spirited treatment of the merits of Cincinnati's long-running public transportation debate. Instead, the article is a borderline-racist, overtly conservative/Republican/elitist rant masquerading as journalism. I was looking for Sean Hannity to weigh in. Apparently the "profile" part of the new name for this rag means "we have profiled your zip code and figure that you must be a white Republican".

I will admit that I am woefully uneducated about the streetcar issue. While I tend to turn a skeptical eye toward any project that uses "Cincinnati City Council" and "88 million dollars" in the same sentence, I find it ludicrous that a city of over two million people (yes, that many people live here) has such an underfunded, underutilized, and, well, unsexy public transportation system. The fact that I can't get from the number one center of commerce (downtown) to the number two (uptown) directly and cheaply is ridiculous. And it is past time that we enable those who don't drive to experience all there is to offer in both areas. What many outsiders don't realize is that Cincinnati's urban core is flourishing. My love for downtown and uptown Cincinnati is a post for another time, but suffice it to say, both residential population growth and business presence has only increased in the last few years, offering services and jobs unavailable elsewhere in the city.

Apparently no one at "Cincinnati Profile" got that message. Here are two actual quotes from the piece:

"All that stands between the two neighborhoods is Over-the-Rhine, where the mood is post-Apocalypse, rundown abandoned buildings, high crime and unemployment, a neighborhood where a flat tire can become an adventure that doesn't end well".

"Street corners along 12th Street, Elm and Race were packed with African Americans who did not appear to be members of the Cincinnati USA Regional Chamber".

The article gives lots of print space to members of various parties opposed to the streetcar while not bothering to interview anyone in favor of the proposal other than City Manager Milton Dohoney, himself a member of the city government and not necessarily a streetcar expert. One of the most-quoted opponents is Dr. Brad Wenstrup, whose credentials are apparently that he is a Republican planning to run for Mayor, and a podiatrist. It took me approximately 0.075 seconds to google "cincinnati streetcar" to find this site, this site, and this site, all of which could have provided some balance to the article. But that assumes that "Cincinnati Profile" intended to practice actual journalism. I believe that gives more credit to this conservative rag disguised as a "lifestyle" magazine. I'm ashamed to believe that simply based on our address, there are those who believe that I support this shoddy, racist, agenda-driven crap.

So listen up, "Cincinnati Profile", you can go ahead and cross this liberal, Democratic, public-transportation using (yes we do!), downtown-shopping family off of your distribution list. And in the process you might save a tree or two. Ha! Gotcha!!

Customers of the Week - Roundup Part One

2009-06-08T10:22:00.004-04:00

The end of an era is quickly approaching...I am leaving the bookstore. However, much like the Mafia and the Marine Corps, you're never really gone when you leave. In fact, one of my co-workers told me "you know we'll call you every weekend to see if you can work, right?" Which is okay. But faced with a crushing load of teaching this summer and periods of outright panic as I try to prepare, I just couldn't stretch myself thin enough to cover everything. Even though working here is hardly "work", in that I mainly talk to people about books and drink coffee, it's still 15 hours of my week that, right now, I need to devote to other things. I'm sad to be leaving, but I'm looking forward to having my weekends back to spend with Lil Blue enjoying all the fun places we bought family passes for and never use.

In honor of my last week of work, I'm devoting this post and the next to a round-up of recent Customers of the Week (in no particular order):

Young Opera Lover: this one just happened yesterday so its fresh in my mind. A young African-American kid (maybe 10 years old) came in to pick up his specially-ordered original cast recording of Carmen Jones. We got to talking when he saw an ad for the local opera company. "I'm so excited that Carmen is coming this summer! I can't wait to see it!" he exclaimed. When I asked him about his interest in opera, he talked about how it was so exciting and how seeing and listening to opera was his favorite thing to do. At a time when arts organizations are seeing revenues in free-fall and aging fans and contributors slowly falling off, the idea that a young child would be so thrilled by what is, let's admit it, an art form that appeals mainly to much older and more Caucasian afiocionados is exciting. I hope that the Cincinnati Opera realizes they have the opportunity to reach *all* people, even the young and non-white. Because if they don't appreciate that opportunity and leverage it for the future, we might not have publicly supported opera for long.

Anti-Twilight Girl: This little girl was about ten years old and asked me for recommendations for new summer reading. After I recommended four books* we got to talking about how she had read the Twilight series and didn't like it. I was instantly intrigued, because she was obviously a good reader, and a young girl who doesn't want to jump into Twilight and become Bella is pretty rare. "Well", she said, "I thought Bella was kind of dumb. She didn't really *do* anything and all she did was whine". Hurray!

Mrs. P: This lady is a very good, regular customer who always purchases an enormous stack of (mostly) literature and non-fiction. She started talking to me and a co-worker last week. As it turns out, she had been a professor in Atlanta during the era of the civil rights movement. She taught literature and was constantly running into trouble with the powers that be (were) at her institution as she attempted to modernize the literature curriculum.

My next post (which will be in August at the rate I'm going lately...) will continue the round-up of the suprising, funny, and intriguing people who come through the doors at an independent bookstore.

* Meet the Austins, The Lightening Thief, The Dark is Rising, Found

UPDATE: How cool is this!! No sooner had I published this post, when a lady came in to look for opera CD's. In the course of our conversation she mentioned that she is the president of the Cincinnati Opera. I told her about the kid who was in yesterday. Luckily we had his name and phone number still around because he had ordered a CD. Long story short, she said she'd make sure that he got a signed poster from Carmen, and got to come back and meet the cast!

Hello, computer...

2009-04-15T09:21:00.002-04:00

So, long time, no blog? Its been a crazy few months around here. I started a new job! I'm teaching Anatomy & Physiology at a local community college. That means that now in addition to Customers of the Week, be on the look out for occasional Students of the Week! I'm having a blast and I'm lucky to have some smart, motivated, amazing students and co-workers.

That's where I've been...but I've vowed to start regular updates again soon. Check back for updates on 1) teaching 2) retail shenanigans 3) Lil' Blue and 4) etc.

cheers!

A Brief History of the Blue Crayon

2009-02-19T22:07:00.004-05:00

Sometimes you do something on a whim, only to discover it's significance after the fact. Take this image that I created at www.worldle.net. It scans your blog and creates a word cloud based on the number of times each word appears in your blog. I guess it shows what's been on my mind lately (click on the image to see it clearer):

Customer of the Week

2009-01-28T20:35:00.003-05:00

This week we finally had a clear winner. Some weeks there are customers are who are so absurd or hilarious that I nominate them just for breaking up the monotony. But this week's winner was just a super-cool person who deserves the dubious honor of being the Blue Crayon COTW simply for being an interesting person.

For some reason I'm getting a lot of hours scheduled at our information desk. I'm choosing to be flattered that the powers that be have such confidence in my knowledge of our inventory, and in my ability to google a book title while looking like I'm doing intense bookseller-jitsu. Or else they realize that the longer I am stuck behind a register, the more likely it is that someone will end up in tears. You be the judge.

An older lady approached the information desk and I instantly braced myself. But! This lady asked if we had a copy of Philosophy for Dummies in stock. Which we actually did, and which was actually a bargain book that we found right away (triple score!) While a different bookseller offered to fetch the copy of the book I chatted with the lady. She said she needed the book because she liked to take college classes for fun, and this semester it was philosophy and "who can keep all that stuff straight?"

Right off the bat, I was impressed. Because...how cool! I hope that when I'm a little old retired lady, I'll still be taking college classes for fun. And instead of taking the community learning classes about retirement planning with all the other old ladies, she took real classes with tests and everything. And apparently, half the fun for her was going out with the other girls in the class. To review: little old lady, going out with college kids. So instantly, an image of her little gray curls kicking back a jello shot. And then she said that she also volunteers twice a week with a local Montessori elementary school. And we talked about Montessori education and parenting philosophies, something that is very much on my mind as Mr Blue and I need to start working on a preschool game plan for Lil Blue.

I thought about her a lot after she left. I don't know anything about her life - maybe she's a rich widow, maybe she worked hard and is wealthy in her own right. Or maybe she's living on a comfortable fixed income and just chooses to splurge on education. No one needs to learn about Kant and Heidegger this late in their life. But this lady is seeking out knowledge for its own sake (or for the sake of finding out where the good parties are...) And she's not just enriching herself, she's paying it forward by working with children. Hopefully they will learn from her the same thing that I have realized as an adult - even if we work our whole lives, we can barely scratch the surface of all there is to know. But we should never stop trying.

Staff Picks - January 2009

2009-01-17T12:19:00.004-05:00

"A book must be an ice-axe to break the seas frozen inside our soul"
Franz Kafka

Those of you who aren't living in the Midwest (hi, Hawaii readers! I see you!) may not have heard that we're currently experiencing record cold temperatures. Yesterday forecast fox gave up and simply listed the temperature as "N/A" with a picture of a thermometer and an icicle. While I can safely say that I'm pretty much over winter by now, even I have to admit there are some things to enjoy about this season. There are all the cliches about how clean the city looks covered in snow, the joys of ice skating, hot chocolate, scarves and winter coats. My favorite thing about winter is how quiet it is. When I get home from work and pull into my driveway, I love just standing there for a minute, looking out at the valley and listening to ... nothing. There's a particular kind of quiet that you get when everything is covered in snow that I just love.

Apparently snow and ice also are conducive to creativity, because this edition of Staff Picks is all about great things that come from icy, snowy places.

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo : Stieg Larssen. This is one of those books that also comes with an interesting story. The author, a Swedish journalist who wrote about the neo-Nazi movement, died unexpectedly shortly after delivering three manuscripts to his agent. The publisher was then left with the unenviable task of promoting a first-time author's work when the author himself was unable to do any press, book tours, etc. Luckily for us, the publisher believed in his work enough to promote it heavily in Europe. In the US, tireless booksellers hand-sold it, it gradually became more and more popular, and the rest is history.

The book itself is a complex inter-weaving of several mysteries taking place over a span of 40 years. The protagonist, a crusading journalist (get it?) is thrown into solving a classic closed-room murder that took place nearly half a century ago. While he is attempting to solve this old mystery, several new mysteries start swirling around him in the present. He eventually hooks up (both literally and figuratively) with the titular girl with the dragon tattoo, who becomes a strange, sort-of ally, critical to solving all of the mysteries. With several different plotlines, two main characters, and scores of secondary characters, its easy to see how the novel could collapse under it's own weight. Luckily, Larssen has the chops to pull it off. I'm looking forward to reading his two remaining books when they become available.

I've been on a bit of a Scandinavian authors kick lately. On my to-be-read pile are
Last Rituals: An Icelandic Novel of of Secret Symbols, Medieval Witchcraft, and Modern Murder by Yrsa Sigurdardottir. Which is a lot of letters to fit on the cover of a book. Also, Redbreast by Norwegian Jo Nesbo (who has a new book out called Nemesis, which has gotten some great reviews)

Með suð í eyrum við spilum endalaust: Sigur Ros Icelandic band Sigur Ros is one of those groups that I was aware of for awhile before really listening. Apparently this album is one of their most accessible, so maybe thats what finally got me to check them out. iTunes loves to recommend Sigur Ros to me, so much so that I finally broke down and gave a listen just to get them to leave me alone. Surprisingly, the music has really grown on me. Its lyrical and strange and very, very well crafted.

Na Na Ni: Fredrik Thanks to NPR for cluing me into this Swedish band. While I'm generally sceptical of bands where every member goes by a single name, I was hooked by how pretty the songs are. I'm a sucker for the first cut, Black Fur, which has an Arcade Fire-like, early U2-esque, soaring, orchestral feel.

LUSH Snow Showers Shower Jelly: Apparently this one was a winter-only product so you'll have to wait until next year to experience it's orangy, clovey, moisturizing goodness. However, I recommend anything you can get your hands on from LUSH, because they are magicians. They are constantly rotating their stock of hand-made glycerin soaps, so don't get too attached to a particular scent. Their Honey Waffle soap is the only thing I've found that doesn't aggravate Lil Blue's eczema. And I treat myself to their liquid body washes and it makes the whole second floor smell like a spa. Awesomeness.

Of course all of these things can be enjoyed more fully when accompanied by an Irish Coffee. Slainte!

Customer of the Week

2009-01-13T21:31:00.002-05:00

This one is short and sweet. I love it when little kids come up to buy things. Especially when they are paying with what is obviously allowance money or lemonade stand money. They take it *so* seriously, with the counting and the price-checking. The savvier ones know to ask me how much it costs with tax so that they make sure they stay within budget. It makes me happy to think how much more special those books or toys are when they're paid for with money their owner has earned.

This week I had two little ones (boy and girl) who were each buying a toy with what their mom informed me was a combination of Christmas money and allowance. The little girl put her toy on the counter. Her mom helped her count out the correct amount, then pushed it over to me, prompting an outraged shout from the girl. "What are you doing?!?" she wailed. "Why are you giving away my money?!?!"

"Remember, we talked about how you would pick out a toy, and then pay for it with your money" her mom replied.
"But that's MY money!!"
"Well, you don't get to keep it and get a toy. To get the toy you have to give up your money"
"But its my money!"
"That's how it works, honey"
"... grumble grumble grumble..."

This exchange made me smile because it reminded me of something I frequently forget. Everything a child does is being done for the first time. I don't doubt that this mom and her daughter talked about how the little girl would pay for her toy. I just don't think it occurred to mom that her daughter didn't know what "pay" really meant.

I felt like telling her "Just wait until you get your first job and see how much money disappears for taxes. Because I very clearly remember proudly opening my first paycheck, only to look at the "Net Pay" box and wail "But that's MY money!!!"

A Very Special Customer of the Week

2009-01-05T20:44:00.003-05:00

Image from A Charlie Brown Christmas. Of course.

jeez, I've been kind of a bummer lately, what with all the serious posts. So in the interest of lightening the mood, I have a COTW - Christmas Edition!

Anyone who's ever worked retail knows that Christmas is not really the season of good cheer. Its more the season of busy-ness, crankiness, passive aggression, unreasonable demands, crowded parking lots, and work work work. Christmas used to be my most favorite time of year. Now, by the time I'm done with work, it takes a few days to relax, decompress, and get ready to actually celebrate Christmas. By which point, it's December 27th. This year I made a concerted effort to not let it get to me. I forced myself to recognize and remember the customers who weren't terrible. When I quit thinking of every non-employee in the store as a potential enemy, I actually started enjoying myself. Kind of. So this post is to recognize all of the many customers who brightened those dark days between Black Friday and Christmas Day.

The man who waited in a 20 minute line, had me ring up his (long, complicated) transaction, only to have my register crash. Then told me not to worry about it, and cheerfully followed me to another part of the store so that I could ring up his transaction again.

The lady who yelled at full volume to her friend "no, I'm not hanging wieners on the tree!" I'm guessing this was a response to a suggestion to purchase one of our mini-dachshund ornaments. Or maybe not? But the image of a wiener-tree was enough to make me laugh.

Every dad shopping for his teenage daughter. Even if every single one bought Twilight. You could tell they were so happy that maybe this year their present wouldn't result in an eye-roll. Awwwww....

Little kids shopping for their parents. Especially the kid who was buying his dad the star wars book and was so excited to be buying something for his dad that he was clutching his present as had as he could.

Every person that bought something off of our giving tree for a local orphanage. You people rock.

Every person who genuinely wished me Merry Christmas, happy holidays, have a nice day, whatever. Thank you for noticing that I'm also a person, who might actually have a family and celebrate holidays too.

And of course, the most special people of all: my co-workers, who make me excited to come to work even when I know it'll be crazy and busy. I'll overlook the fact that no one saved me a Dixie beer. This time.

C Is For Cookie, And That's Good Enough For Me

2008-12-25T12:28:00.002-05:00

We've been watching a lot of Sesame Street lately. Lil' Blue was first introduced to the show via that ubiquitous red Muppet Elmo. However, she's branched out into other characters, and her current favorite is Cookie Monster. Toddlers, as you know, learn by repetition - and so I've gotten to watch a lot of Cookie Monster. I assume his appeal lies in his floppy fuzzy body that resembles nothing more than a big blanky, and his silly voice and big googly eyes. But as we watch Cookie Monster over and over and over, I've found him appealing to me as well. Because Cookie Monster, more than anything else, lives in the moment. When he sings "C is for cookie, that's good enough for me", his entire world encompasses the giant cookie in his hand. Past cookies are gone, future cookies irrelevant and unknown. That cookie truly is good enough. Cookie Monster is zen.

As we celebrate our second Christmas with Lil Blue, I've had a chance to think about how much she's grown just in the last year. Last Christmas, every picture of her is from the same vantage point: straight down, as she laid on a blanket because she couldn't yet sit up. In just one short year, that baby lying prone on a blanket is a big kid who can walk, run and jump. She can chatter constantly and knows her animals, colors, and even a few numbers. The baby that barely ate solid foods a year ago now can get her own snacks and request particular types of crackers or juice. Everything is impermanent. Dinosaurs that ruled the earth are now dust below the ground. Our lives are infinitely shorter. I can't slow her growth, and I wouldn't want to. But what I can do is be fully present in each moment, and to appreciate the short time we do have together. Happy holidays, everyone!

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
~Buddha

Twilight Time: A Review

2008-12-11T19:39:00.004-05:00

I finally gave in and read Twilight. Mainly, I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. If you haven't noticed (because you don't watch TV, read the newspapers, surf the net, have a teenager, know a teenager, know of a teenager, etc) this book and its three equally-massive sequels have taken over the world. Now, I'll admit that I had low expectations as I went into this endeavor. And I was not disappointed. I mean, I was disappointed, which is what I expected, which...whatever.

Yes, it is a love story. Yes, some vampires show up, and blah blah blah. But after 544 pages, I closed the book thinking "and.....so?" Granted, I haven't read the other three books. Maybe, 2,000 pages later, Bella undergoes some sort of challenge or grows in some manner that explains her current status as a heroine. But it sure doesn't happen in Twilight. Bella's main "challenge" is that she chooses to move to a different city, where she happens to fall in love with a strange boy, who happens to be a vampire. The only real drama occurs when Bella is briefly chased by a vampire bounty hunter (?) who traps her and attempts to drink her blood. But Bella doesn't fight, she doesn't mouth off, she doesn't really do anything except for close her eyes and hope that it ends quickly. Which it does (for the bounty hunter) because the aforementioned boyfriend shows up to save the day. And....scene. Whatever. Its not that Twilight is bad, per se, its just that it could be so much better. And there are already so many books that are so much better.

On that note, allow me to present my list of female fantasy heroines who are better role models for young girls than Bella Swan:

Meg Murry: Meg is the heroine of Madeleine L'Engle's Time Quintet. Much like most young girls, Meg often feels insecure, and her insecurity leads to confrontations with classmates and teachers. She compares herself unfavorably to her beautiful mother (who just happens to be a Nobel-prize winning scientist), and worries about not fitting in due to her brilliant and famous parents, and her genius younger brother Charles Wallace. Yet, despite her insecurities and fears, it is Meg who travels through time and space, first to rescue her father from the evil planet Camazotz, then to rescue her brother Charles Wallace. Through Meg, we learn that regardless of who we are, the most important quality we can have is compassion (including compassion for our own faults).

Sally Lockhart: The first of two heroines created by Philip Pullman. I've often wondered how a middle-aged man can create two of the most vibrant and memorable young female characters, but I'll chalk it up to superior writing chops. The Sally Lockhart novels take place in Victorian England, and are not so much fantasy novels as straight-up mysteries. What makes Sally such a fantastic character is that she feels incredibly real and modern, without taking the reader out of the Victorian setting. Sally faces up to some of the nastiest characters from the darkest corners of London, using only her bravery and intelligence (and the ability to "shoot like a Cossack").

Lyra Belacqua/Silvertongue: I can go on and on about how much I love Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials series. Like Sally Lockhart, Lyra is orphaned at a young age. Of all the characters on this list, Lyra faces the most intense danger and personal challenges, yet arguably achieves the greatest victory. Lyra is clever, irreverant, and most of all, incredibly brave.

Vicky Austin: Unlike the other characters on this list, Vicky Austin's challenges are more internal than external (although she does face quite a bit of real danger at times). Vicky is intensely introverted but cares passionately about others. Her most important quality is her faith in the goodness in others and in humanity.

Lucy Pevensie: The first to discover Narnia, Lucy is always the voice of truth. While her brother Edmund betrays the others and the true king of Narnia, and her older brother and sister are cautious and hesitant, it is Lucy who gives herself over to Aslan whole-heartedly and saves the day (and all of Narnia).

Jane Drew: One of several children from Susan Cooper's Dark is Rising sequence, and the only central female character. Jane has several key scenes, mainly in Greenwitch. She is taken along to a ceremony in which the women of a Welsh village build the Greenwitch - a giant figure made of twigs and leaves which is ceremonially thrown into the ocean. While the other women in the village see the ceremony mainly as a social event, Jane alone sees the deeper significance in the ritual. Jane understands that the figure of the Greenwitch is not just remote and wild, but lonely and sad, and wishes that it could be happy. Her compassion and intuition are rewarded when the Greenwitch gives a valuable secret to Jane in a dream.

Each one of these characters is tested - some multiple times. Jane Drew battles the forces of the dark, Lucy battles the White Witch. Meg Murry travels through space and confronts the Echtroi who are trying to extinguish the stars. Sally Lockhart is chased and attacked by criminals. Vicky Austin is kidnapped and left for dead in Antarctica and nearly sacrificed to pagan gods when she travels backwards in time. And Lyra Belacqua travels to the dangerous, frozen North, and then to land of the dead, where she battles a warrior angel for the release of all the trapped souls in hell. Compared to these battles, Bella Swan and her vampire boyfriend just seem silly. Each of the other characters is compelled on a journey by something greater than herself, be it promises made to friends, rescuing endangered family members, or saving the world. Bella deliberately puts herself in danger, and then relies on Edward to save her. I see thousands and thousands of young girls are reading Twilight. And while I'm happy to see them reading anything, I just feel that they could do so much better.

The Wheels On My Car Go...Nowhere At All, Currently

2008-11-25T13:56:00.004-05:00

UPDATED UPDATE!! When we got to the dealership, I suddenly realized that if I was going to commit to paying them hundreds of dollars every month, I might as well be paying it for a new car, instead of slowly creating a new car by replacing my old one piece by piece. SO! After crunching the numbers with my brother-in-law, car salesman extraordinaire, I drove home in a NEW CAR!! It is so exciting! With options!! And all working parts!! I woke up this morning and ran to the window to make sure it was really there!

This post is brought to you by Chevrolet, who reminds you why they're currently in Washington, D.C., asking Congress to raise their allowance.

I grew up in the Rust Belt (which becomes the Snow Belt in the winter!!). I knew plenty of people whose parents worked in steel mills or in steel-related factories. So I've made a point of always driving American cars. And all in all, I haven't been too disappointed. I mean, in the last 12 years, I've only needed to fix or replace: the entire main electrical system (Dodge); the brakes, twice (Ford); the silver pony on the front of the mustang (not really Ford's fault, that one); the brakes, AGAIN (Chevy); the side mirrors, twice (Chevy, but myself and the City of Cincinnati maintenance department can share the blame for those); the serpentine belt (Ford); and the power steering gasket (Chevy). So you know, normal maintenance.

Those issues aside, my 9-year-old Chevy SUV has been a pretty sturdy and dependable car until lately. I've been having problems doing some unimportant maneuvers like stopping and turning around corners. Due to the current state of our finances, I've been trying the Christian Science method of car repair. Apparently my faith isn't strong enough because yesterday I nearly launched, Dukes of Hazzard-style, into the Ohio River. Luckily all that training I got in the Snow Belt paid off and I was able to wrestle the car back onto the road and avoid completely skidding out. But the experience was sufficiently harrowing to convince me to actually take the car into the dealership for a physical. The major downside (aside from what I'm sure will be a huge bill) is that I've been forced to spend the day cleaning my house, blogging, reading other blogs, futzing around on Facebook, and reading Twilight (more on that later!). All of this instead of doing important Thanksgiving-related tasks like picking up my 25-lb turkey. Not that I don't love doing all the things I've been doing, but if I don't get my car back soon, my family will be eating cereal for Thanksgiving. Sorry, guys! Its not too late to change your plans!

UPDATE: I just talked to the dealership and its going to cost me $1600 to fix my stupid car. Gee, guys, do you think you could spare a few bucks from the $25 billion dollars you asked Congress for? Or at least, could you give me a ride to pick up my turkey?

This Post Not Sponsored by PETA

2008-11-21T20:05:00.004-05:00

My friend A recently told me the story of how her daughter M discovered the Circle of Life. The family was eating dinner when M asked her mother what they were having. "This is chicken" A told her daughter. M looked at her plate, then looked at her mother, eyes welling with tears. "Bock bock?" she whispered, horrified.

Lil' Blue was less moved by the whole idea.

We were eating chicken saag when Lil' Blue pointed at a lump of chicken and asked us what it was. "That's chicken", we said. Lil' Blue looked at her plate quizzically, then brightened. "Bock bock!" she shouted. "Yes, that's right. Bock bock" I responded tentatively. She thought for a moment, then crammed another piece in her mouth, happily proclaiming "Bock bock! Yum yum!!"

Proof of the Apocalypse

2008-11-19T17:50:00.001-05:00

Thought you'd never hear a muppet say "crunk"? WRONG!!!

Lil Blue loves this video.

COTW - Of Mice and Customers

2008-11-17T20:37:00.002-05:00

In the spirit of the season, I'm doing today's Customer of the Week following yesterday's abysmal customer experience. Yin/yang, etc etc. This week's winner was another lady of a certain age who was buying Christmas paraphernalia. Normally I'm not a big fan of Christmas kitsch (she says...prior to unpacking a whole freakin' tub of Christmassy stuff I've accumulated through the years) But we sell these little mouse figurines that are pretty darn cute with their little christmas elf hats on. Anyway, the COTW was buying a few of the tiny elvish mice.

"I have a friend who's got a problem with mice in her house" she told me. "So I'm going to sneak these in. She needs to learn to laugh about the situation". Now that alone probably would have been enough to make me laugh, because...well, that's really cute. I commiserated with her friend, explaining that our 100-year old house also had served as a rodent flophouse during the winter months. She then told me the cutest story ever: In a nutshell, she and her husband had been having problems with mice all winter. They finally tracked down where the little guys were coming in, and found a nest with no mama mouse. Inside were three teeny, brand new baby mice no bigger than her fingernail. Which she and her husband rescued, kept in a hamster cage, and raised as pets! Altogether now.....awwwwwwww.

There is nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others

2008-11-16T20:42:00.005-05:00

A customer called me stupid today. I don't mean she implied it with a snide comment. I mean, she called me stupid. In fact, she went on a rant during which she stated that thinking obviously hurt my meager brain, and that I shouldn't "strain myself" trying to think. I was slightly cheered by the customers who stepped in to tell her to cool it. I was even complimented on "handling it" well after she left. Although truthfully, I wasn't so much handling it as waiting for it to be a bad joke, and not someone completely losing their shit. After she'd left, I trembled for nearly half an hour from the adrenalin that shot through me. I laughed it off, even during the telling and re-tellings with my co-workers for the rest of the day. It wasn't until much later, sitting in my daughter's dark, warm room, that the tears came. I'm not a crier - I don't often crumble into a soggy mess or wear my emotions on my sleeve. When confronted with an emotional situation I'm more likely to default to rage or just a spacy nothingness. But today was a long time coming. Even though she'd long since fallen asleep, I held Lil Blue and suddenly I dissolved. I had thought I was so brave, quitting my legal job - thought that I was teaching her that there's more to life than chasing a career. That I love her so much I wanted a job that didn't leave me exhausted and mentally bruised at the end of the day. So what am I teaching her now? That's its okay to stand behind a counter being the brunt of the anonymous public's anger? That I think so little of myself that I let someone call me stupid to my face and let it go? How can I teach her about pride and self-respect when I couldn't muster any of my own?

I haven't yet figured out how to implement my "not taking shit from customers anymore" plan and not get fired in the process. But I'm done kissing the ass of people who can't even be civil. Yes, I'm in a service job. But I'm not your servant.

Bunch of savages in this town.*

*TM Randal Graves, of course.

COTW - and a lesson about judging books by their covers

2008-11-13T18:35:00.002-05:00

I had initially planned a serious Customer of the Week Post centering around some post-election issues. I wanted to award the COTW to all the white people buying Song of Solomon, presumably because Barack Obama said it was one of his favorite books. Or to the man who bought a stack of Audacity of Hope to send to his friends in Europe and South America because, he said, he was so proud of America for getting it right. However, one customer who came in this afternoon just had to be the COTW because she taught me an important lesson about judging books (or customers) by their appearance. And also because she was kind of bad-ass.

About half an hour before I was due to leave this afternoon, a little old lady came up to the register. I braced myself for 1) being bitched at for not carrying enough Jesus-centric Christmas cards 2) carrying too much liberal-biased Barack Obama propaganda or 3) some other nonsense that would require me to mentally hum "la la la la la" while faking a bookstore-approved level of customer service. You probably know the type. Little old lady sweater, lots of makeup, hair that most likely requires the use of one of the plastic hat things when it rains. But, all she wanted was to ask how she could replace her customer card. I went into my spiel about how we can look her up when she makes purchases so its no big deal to not have a card, blah blah blah, when you renew we can get you a new card, yada yada yada.

Old lady: "okay. I just wanted to check. I lost my wallet when I got carjacked last week".

Me: "!!!"

It wasn't just that she'd gotten carjacked - you don't hear that every day. It was the fact that she was so blase, and seemed more irritated that now she had to replace all of the stuff in her wallet. And it gets better! She had gotten jacked in an area of town that mainly consists of college bars where kids go to get cheap beer and listen to indie bands. Was she lost? Picking up her grandson? Driving home after a Wussy concert? I'll never know. But needless to say, I hope someday I can be as badass and chill as that old lady. Rock on, grandma!

Dust on the Shelves

2008-11-09T19:54:00.002-05:00

*I'll return to the regularly scheduled Customer of the Week next week. I've had this work-related post kicking around in my head all week and finally feel like I can get it down on "paper".

The powers that be at my store recently decided that it was time for our regular cleaning and alphabetizing binge. You would be amazed at how much gets misplaced, mis-shelved, and just plain lost in a large bookstore. Since we alphabetize the entire store several times a year, you'd think we'd stop finding random magazines and books from ten years ago shoved behind other books, but yet it happens. There's no particular rhyme or reason to which section gets organized in what order. Mainly, the managers post a list of sections and we all hack away at it until only erotica is left. Then someone finally sucks it up (hee!) and organizes the sexy books.

I love alphabetizing, in part because it appeals to my latent OCD. After I finish a section, I just stand back and admire all the books all lined up neatly next to their mates. But mainly I like it because it gives me an opportunity to actually look at every book in a particular section. So I tend to gravitate toward the sections that interest me: religion, philosophy, science.

Lately I've noticed that I've spent easily as much time, if not more, dusting off the shelves rather than actually organizing. And that saddens me. Our country has been at war with two Muslim countries for nearly seven years. And yet the entire shelf of books on Islam were coated with dust. The polar ice caps are melting, coastal countries are drowning, and hurricanes are regularly threatening the existence of large numbers of people. And yet, dust covers the books on climate change. Gothic teenage vampire romances go flying out the door in droves, while we're constantly returning books about religion and philosophy and science because they've languished on our shelves for too long and must be returned to the publisher.

What nonfiction does sell is often of the "political expose" genre - this has been especially popular during the tenure of George W Bush et al. While certainly such books have a purpose, I suspect that many of them fulfill for the educated urban liberal the same purpose as People magazine does for the rest of the population. While it is certainly important to read about what is happening in the world, it seems that very few readers have an interest in why. At least not at the deep critical level that requires a basic understanding of who our enemies are, and what they believe.

Likewise, there has been an explosion of books on "going green" - a facile label for doing things like buying $20 reusable shopping bags. But yet we rarely, if ever, sell books to those interested in learning about the science of climate change. Even though having a basic knowledge of the underlying science allows one to read the "green" books with a critical eye, and take actions based on rational principles and not simply those promoted by the latest book printed on recycled paper.

Of course, I understand that reading non-fiction is harder. Sometimes even boring. And I'm as guilty as the next person and probably in no position to preach. However, I also appreciate that education is an active, not a passive, undertaking. To call myself an educated person, I have an obligation to pursue knowledge, even if doing so is harder than reading the next Spenser novel. I don't want to see dust gather on the shelves of the fiction section, the mysteries, or even the romance novels. That's not the point. I would just like to see the day when I don't need to wipe an inch of dust off the books in those other parts of the store.

Republicans Bite Back

2008-11-07T08:29:00.001-05:00

I couldn't resist posting this. Apparently everyone in President Bush's inner circle is acting like a dick after the election.

44

2008-11-05T07:11:00.002-05:00

We did it! My generation elected it's John F. Kennedy. We've finally closed the door on the past and bought our tickets for the future. And we did it our way. We did it $25 at a time. We did it by knocking on doors and making phone calls. Did you see the coverage of long lines of voters? Look at the faces in the lines. Young, black, latino...the faces that previous candidates wrote off because they don't vote, they can't be bothered to show up at the polls. And they certainly won't wait in line for four hours. Except for we did. We skipped class and took off work, we rode the bus and brought our kids, and we showed that we matter. Yes, we can. And yes, we did.

Customer of the Week - Week 2

2008-10-27T20:35:00.003-04:00

Damn, has it been a week already? Time has just flown by. I'm still getting back into the groove of working a regular schedule, but I've enjoyed being back at the bookstore. Now I'm trying to get ready for Halloween, which is apparently this Friday, which means I need to carve some pumpkins with a quickness. But, since it's Monday (and therefore the start of my "weekend" - ie, two days off in a row) that means its time for this week's Customer of the Week! Only one stood out this week, but he was fun. The winner of the COTW, Week Two, is ..... the Flamboyant Former Bookseller!

FFB came in to order some books by Italo Calvino, an author I haven't read but who definitely intrigues me. Somehow we got to talking about books that are life-changing. The ones that you remember years later, that somehow were the right words at the right time to encapsulate everything that you needed to hear and feel. It turns out that he had worked for years as a bookseller. I told him about how much I enjoy selling books to young teenagers - I love the excitement on their faces when they purchase Siddartha or Catcher in the Rye or The Fountainhead. I wonder how they found out about their book - were they randomly searching the internet and stumbled across it? Or did an older and wiser mentor subtlely suggest they pick up a copy?

FFB is the COTW not just because he was fun, insightful, and wearing a totally fabulous striped shirt with the color up, Fonzi-style. But because he got me thinking about my own life changing book. Like millions of teenagers before me, I can remember the first time I read On the Road. Unlike many other teenagers, I've read it since then. Multiple times. While I don't think its really Kerouac's best work (Desolation Angels is better written, Visions of Cody easier to read, and Dharma Bums a more interesting story), something about On the Road makes it accessible to a young reader in a way that his other works aren't.

On the Road is often criticized for being dated, but those critics are missing the point. When I first read On the Road as a young pre-teen, I didn't read it as a travel guide to hitch-hiking across the country. But I recognized myself in Sal Paradise. Because the story of Sal Paradise is the story of a young person with an unlimited capacity for dreams, who ultimately discovers that his dreams have outpaced him. His journey almost ends before it begins, when he finds himself standing along the side of an empty road, heading the wrong direction, soaked and miserable and wearing the wrong kind of shoes for the road. At the very end of the novel, he is forced to confront the fact that his best friend Dean, the friend who had propelled him on his epic journey across the country, is actually a self-centered jerk. But through it all Sal Paradise just keeps moving. And that was what was most appealing to me as a teenager, and which still resonates now at 30 - that you'll never run out of road.

Maybe all that Kerouac in my formative years explains why I'm still searching for a niche and a career after all this time, why I'm still convinced there can be greatness in my future. Who knows. But there are worse novels to serve as a guidepost. So thanks, FFB, for bringing up great memories. And reminding me of some of the things I enjoy most about my job. Now its time to go back and re-re-read my copy of the On the Road - the one that still has my name scrawled in pen on the cover, from so many years ago.

The Inaugural Blue Crayon Customer of the Week Award

2008-10-20T20:42:00.003-04:00

Regular readers may have noticed that when I talk about my job, I tend to spend 90% of my time complaining about the customers. That's because 90% of them suck. But I realized that I should also be talking about the 10% that don't suck, who aren't assholes and who help me enjoy my job. Therefore, starting today, I'll be posting once a week to congratulate the Blue Crayon Customer of the Week. Winners are determined in my sole and completely arbitrary discretion.

This week we actually have a tie:

COTW 1: Tiny Obama supporter. Today a young girl (maybe 6 or 7 years old) came into the store with her abuela. She was a little elfin thing and she immediately flitted up to our table of election books. "Look!" she said. "Its Obama!". And clapped her hands. My heart grew three sizes that shift, because awwww. And yay! Yes we can, indeed!

COTW 2: Nice mom with her pre-teen daughter. Work in retail for any length of time, and you will see the entire range of horrible parenting. From neglect to emotional abuse and everything in between. Our store is in a ritzy area of town, so we tend to get a lot of the Type A parents. The poor kids drag in, exhausted from piano/soccer/swimming/French class and bearing a long list of private school-mandated reading. Mom or Dad snips at them (and me!) the whole time and the kid never gets to buy a book they actually want to read, because god forbid they take time away from something they can put on their college applications. So anyway, I was bracing myself when a mom came up with her daughter (in a soccer uniform, natch). Imagine my surprise when the mom was nice - really pleasant! She asked me if I could recommend some books for her daughter, and then let her daughter explain what she liked to read. And she listened while her daughter talked! And would randomly squeeze her shoulders! You could tell mom and daughter actually liked each other. It was such a change from the normal pre-teen parenting dynamic that I see that I talked to them for a long time. It turns out the daughter likes science fiction, so good for her!

An honorary mention goes to any customer who can make me laugh. This week's winner: the husband of one of the aforementioned Type-A moms. The mom (not a COTW) stormed off in a huff because I directed her to the information desk, for, you know information. Not just to get her out of my face (although that was somewhat true too) but because I was the only one at the register, and I knew that the info desk would be able to spend more time with her and actually find her stuff quicker. Anyway. After she blew off, her husband said "oh well. she doesn't like me much either". Hahaha! Also....kind of sad. For him.

Overheard at the Playground

2008-10-15T16:16:00.003-04:00

Remember that one episode of the X-Files where there was the teenager who was a faith healer? And how it was supposed to be about the nature of faith, but really it was about how kids that talk like adults creep us out? Except for this kid, of course, who was just really dorky, until he grew up and became awesome. Anyway...today at the playground. Lil Blue and I were running around on the jungle gym when I heard a young boy (maybe eight years old) and his even younger friend talking. Here's what I heard (I swear I'm not making any of this up)

Kid: "You see what your problem is? Its that your clothes don't match your personality"
Younger Kid: "What do you mean?"
Clinton Kelly: "What you wear and how you look influence how people perceive you"
Bud Fox:"So what should I do?"
Gordon Gekko: "Well, look at it this way. If you dress like a princess, people will think you're a princess. Heck, if you dress like a cat, people will think you're a cat. You need to think about what you want to be, and then dress accordingly"

Seriously? Is this how kids talk these days? I mean, I can't argue with the kid's advice. And he was wearing a very fashion-forward blue-on-blue ensemble complemented by vintage Pumas (even more impressive given that he was probably -15 years old when the original Pumas were hot). Lil Blue and I looked at each other, and I'm sure she was thinking "yeah, mom, thanks for letting the kids think I'm a dirty hippie love child being raised by two moms, what with the no makeup and the cargo shorts and the Keens, you might as well be wearing an Ani DiFranco tshirt. I'll just be over here with the fancy moms wishing I had a ballerina costume on instead of this ridiculous Grateful Dead tshirt" Damn, kids are so judgmental these days.

Don't Stop Believing

2008-10-14T07:39:00.000-04:00

35-14, people.

FACE!

NFL Week 6 Picks

2008-10-10T15:54:00.003-04:00

Remember two weeks ago when I said that my nemesis, the Carolina Panthers, had managed to NOT screw my picks, and that maybe my streak of NEVER EVER betting one of their games correctly was ended? Didja watch last week's game? Did you see how I said that KC was going to upset Carolina? Did you see what happened next? That's right, Carolina proceeded to win the game 34-0. ZERO! Argh! So here's this weeks picks.

Visit the Commish for all the action!

BALTIMORE @ INDIANAPOLIS
MIAMI @ HOUSTON
CHICAGO @ ATLANTA
DETROIT @ MINNESOTA
OAKLAND @ NEW ORLEANS
CINCINNATI @ NY JETS
CAROLINA @ TAMPA BAY
ST LOUIS @ WASHINGTON
JACKSONVILLE @ DENVER
DALLAS @ ARIZONA
PHILADELPHIA @ SAN FRANCISCO
GREEN BAY @ SEATTLE
NEW ENGLAND @ SAN DIEGO

MONDAY NIGHT GAME
NY GIANTS @ CLEVELAND: I know, I may be the only person in America who is willing to bet on the Brownies. But I can't desert my team in their most desperate hour. Also, the Browns have a habit of playing up to substantially better teams.

NB: Can you believe the line on this game is only NYG -7.5? Are they watching the same Browns team I am? Is someone planning to sabotage the entire Giants starting lineup? Can I stand to wait until Monday?

TIEBREAKER: 30

Reaching Out and Touching Someone. Or Twenty.

2008-10-06T18:45:00.002-04:00

My little sister (hi, B!) finally convinced me to join Facebook...and now I'm wondering where the last 24 hours disappeared to. You see, I switched schools several times growing up, including between junior high and high school. And back in those dark ages, we didn't have email, cell phones, text messaging, twitter, facebook, et cetera, to use to keep in touch. We picked up the phone (which sometimes, at least in my house, had a dial) and called each other. Well, I hate talking on the phone. Did then, do now, always have. So many of my friendships dwindled away to nothing. Kids I sat with on the bus, ate lunch with, told secrets to and passed notes to, all went their separate ways. Until NOW when I can sit at my kitchen table and chat away with people I haven't seen for five....um....ten years. We even found my "little sister" from the family who hosted me during my homestay in France!

Finding one friend in particular has been wonderful. We'll call him M. Back in our school days, a lot of the kids would call M gay, I guess because he was soft spoken and liked art. Although, it was an art school, so all of us probably seemed gay to kids at regular school. But I digress. I'm pretty sure the other kids made M's life hell in school, but he was always a good friend to me and always had a huge smile on his face. Since high school he's moved to a city he adores and has a fabulous job that brings him lots of satisfaction. And I am so, so happy for him. He was my friend and I was always nice to him. But I wasn't brave enough to stand up for him when other kids said hateful things. Maybe he is actually gay. Maybe he's not. That's not the point. The point is that those kids were assholes, and I should have done more for my friend.

My sincerest desire is that Lil Blue won't be that kid. That she won't be any of those kids - not the mean girl, not the picked-on kid, and not the kid standing quietly by. I can only hope that her father and I do a good a job molding her into a person who is both kind and courageous.

NFL Week 5 Picks

2008-10-04T12:12:00.004-04:00

(Image courtesy of 80's Tees which you should totally visit and buy lots of stuff from)

So what a weird season its been so far, huh? The Colts are 1-2, the Patriots are looking like mere mortals at 2-1, while the Titans and the Bills are 4-0. Arizona is leading its division. Of course, the Bengals and Lions are doing about as well as expected at 0-4 and 0-3, respectively, so its not completely Bizarro NFL. But it does make picking these games a little trickier, since I can't just pencil in a win or loss for certain teams.

I'm posting a little late here, but still squeaking it out before Sunday games begin. Last week's results were not any better than the week before, indicating that whether I do actual research or not, I can't accurately predict more than nine games. BUT in other news, my nemesis the Carolina Panthers finally didn't screw me over! In the years and years that I've played fantasy football and squandered money on office football pools, I have never ONCE accurately predicted a Carolina game. I pick win, they lose. In retaliation I pick lose, they win against all odds. Luckily, no one sent a memo to the Atlanta Falcons and they graciously put up a paltry nine points. Thanks, guys!

Winning teams are in RED this week.

TENNESSEE @ BALTIMORE: This is a tricky one for me. On one hand, I feel like TN is due for a loss. On the other hand, TN is playing fantastic defense, and BAL is playing with a rookie QB (the awesomely named Joe Flacco) leading an offense on which no one is 100% healthy. So I'm giving it to TN, in what I predict will be a low scoring game.

KANSAS CITY @ CAROLINA: I'm going out on a limb and giving this one to KC. I don't think CAR is as good as their record would make you think, and KC has some good talent on their offense.

CHICAGO @ DETROIT: "what's the score" "0-0" "who's winning?" "the Bears"

ATLANTA @ GREEN BAY: Okay, Packers fans, help me out here. I really wavered on this one, mainly due to all the GB injuries. But I'm going to pick GB because I think ATL can't win on the road.

INDIANAPOLIS @ HOUSTON: Someone has to win this game, and I doubt it'll be the Texans, home field or not.

SAN DIEGO @ MIAMI: Poor Chad Pennington. I really think he got a raw deal in NY. He rushed back from shoulder surgery because the NY media was bitching at him, which led to his other injuries and all the complaints that he couldn't throw with any velocity. I wanted to see him do well in Miami because he seems like a nice guy who could be a good (not great) QB on the right team. Oh well. Coulda woulda shoulda, and I'm giving it to the Chargers.

SEATTLE @ NY GIANTS: The New York Football Giants are on a tear. They look like the Patriots of years past.

WASHINGTON @ PHILADELPHIA: Brian Westbrook has all the ruggedness of a thoroughbred, which is to say none at all.

TAMPA BAY @ DENVER: No way Denver's losing two in a row, especially not at home.

BUFFALO @ ARIZONA: The Cardinals are leading their division mathematically. The Bills haven't lost a game.

CINCINNATI @ DALLAS: Ouch

NEW ENGLAND @ SAN FRANCISCO: I think NE's defense will win this one.

PITTSBURGH @ JACKSONVILLE: PIT wins games on the ground, and pretty much all of their starters and much of their O-line is on IR. Ben Roethlisberger (Go Redhawks!) is just not going to morph into a consistent pocket passer, and Hines Ward can't catch every pass.

MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL
MINNESOTA @ NEW ORLEANS: I think NO has the edge, plus they've got the home field advantage.

POINTS: 40

Do or Do Not

2008-09-29T10:27:00.004-04:00

“Victory is won not in miles but in inches. Win a little now, hold your ground, and later, win a little more"
~Louis L'Amour

On Sunday I turned 30. This won't be a post about what a milestone I've achieved, or a reflection on life lived to date. Honestly, I haven't thought a whole lot about my birthday. It was, however, a momentous weekend for other reasons. Primarily, I completed my first half marathon! Everything came together to make for a perfect running experience. The weather was beautiful - the race started at 8:00 when there was still a lot of cool fog. We ran out of Oxford into the country, so for about the first hour there was nothing but misty farmland, with cows and horses just starting to wake up. As we approached the Indiana border the sun started burning off the fog, which turned the air into a million tiny prisms. Mile 8 was the turn-around, just inside Indiana. Coming back was not as cool, since we were running east into the sun, and the elevation was definitely going up. I had never run more than 10 miles before, and when I hit the 10 mile mark and still felt great, I experienced a big energy boost. At mile 12 it finally hit me that I was definitely going to finish this race, and finish strong. One last hill, down the brick streets and under the finish arch, and DONE! Official time: 2:25:07. My goal had been 2:15, but given my recent knee problems I was plenty happy to have hit 11 minute miles. So now I'm taking some time off from running, and looking forward to my next "big" race - the Heart Mini-Marathon in the spring.

While I was running, I had plenty of time to think. I came to the realization that I guess now I really can call myself a "runner". I've always avoided that title - even though I run 15 miles a week and have completed a lot of races, I've felt that other people are runners - I'm still just a hack. I realized that for my entire life, I've felt that I was an outsider - a pretender. I'd like to claim that it is due to an overdeveloped desire for independence, but really I think it is based in fear. Fear that if I call myself "runner" (or "lawyer" or "martial artist" or "blogger"...), if I stand up and claim membership in a group, that it will encourage others to scratch the surface - to see if I really am what I claim to be. And what if that core under the surface disappoints? What if all I am capable of is putting on a good display? But there comes a time when even I have to admit that the mask has become permanently attached. I am a runner - it is who I am. Because I care, and because I try, and because I miss running when I take time off.

However, in calling myself a runner, I force myself to take running seriously. Hacks take time off because they're lazy. Runners do not. My next goal is to start increasing my speed, starting with my 5K time. So starting this weekend, I incorporate speedwork into my training. And I can't wait!

Do or do not; there is no try
~Yoda

NFL Week 4 Picks

2008-09-26T15:06:00.002-04:00

I ended up 9-7 last week - so much for my strategy of "research" and "picking based on statistics and carefully reasoned analysis". This week, I'm going with the "gut feeling" strategy. Winning teams are in BOLD.

As always, visit the Commish (Insta-Mom) for all the action!

Cleveland @ Cincinnati
Atlanta@ Carolina
Houston @ Jacksonville
Denver @ Kansas City
San Francisco @ New Orleans
Arizona @ NY Jets
Green Bay @ Tampa Bay
Minnesota @ Tennessee
San Diego @ Oakland
Buffalo @ St. Louis
Washington @ Dallas
Philadelphia @ Chicago

Monday Night Football
Baltimore @ Pittsburgh
Combined final score: 27

Share the Health

2008-09-25T14:19:00.002-04:00

My friend Amy in Ohio is giving away two free, three-month memberships to Weigh Watchers! Awesome, right? Well, to make it even better, Weight Watchers is currently sponsoring a program where they donate a pound of food to the hungry for every pound lost by members!

Visit her blog here for all the info on how to enter.

Bless Me, Internets

2008-09-23T21:56:00.007-04:00

We all have our secrets. We've all done something we're ashamed of - done it in the dark when we thought no one would find out. For some of us, it was with just one person, others were all alone in their bedrooms. Some might have even done it with a group.

Yes, we've all enjoyed a movie or TV show and been ashamed to admit it.

(Come on now, someone here had to have paid to see Waterworld)

So, here is my list of shame - I'm bringing it out into the light for all to see. Step into the bloggy confessional with me and share your secret, guilty pleasures!

1. Galaxy Quest: I love this movie. I own this movie. I watch it all the time. There's just something in the way that it pokes fun at science fiction, while simultaneously celebrating it, that I find touching. Mr Blue and I frequently shout "Never give up! Never surrender!" Because we're dorks. But we're dorks with a collection of swords and weapons. Ha!

2. A League of Their Own: I'm embarrassed by this one because I make a point of never watching chick flicks. On paper, this movie has everything I hate, namely feelings. And no explosions. But for some reason, I can't not watch it when I flip past it on TV. Granted, its nominally a sports movie, but we all know its really about feelings.

3. Farscape: I was a late-comer to this fabulously cheesy TV series about an American astronaut who goes through a wormhole and yada yada yada. One of the main cast-members? Was a muppet. Every episode contains at least one science fiction cliche, if not many. But yet, I got sucked in after the first couple of episodes and couldn't stop watching.

4. Stargate: Atlantis: By the time you reach this spin-off of a spin-off, any original greatness from the Stargate movie has been greatly diluted. But on Friday evenings after Lil Blue is in bed and my brain can't handle anything with, well, a complex plot or sophisticated character development, Stargate: Atlantis fills the void. Oh, and Jason Momoa is smokin' hot. And Rachel Luttrell topped Mr Blue and my list of "women who could take me in a fight in real life"*.

5. Labyrinth: Another movie featuring muppets. Weird. Also, David Bowie in purple stretch pants, a young (pre-Oscar!) Jennifer Connelly, and the Bog of Eternal Stench. And musical numbers! Who doesn't secretly love this movie? Communists, that's who.

*The complete list includes Rachel Luttrell, Jolene Blalock, Eliza Dushku, and Jessica Biel

How to be an Asshole in a Bookstore

2008-09-20T12:50:00.004-04:00

1) Reshelve books. Be creative! Because after 9 hours on my feet, there's nothing I'd rather do after close than go on an exciting scavenger hunt for missing books. (Special exemption for the person who shelved the Kama Sutra in "martial arts", because that made me laugh)

2) Allow your children to run wild. I myself have a toddler, so I don't expect children to be seen and not heard. However... screaming, pulling books off shelves, and throwing food are over the line. Its a bookstore, not Gymboree.

3) Hit on the staff. The bigger the age difference, the better! True story: a co-worker of mine received a note (!) from a married man (!!) while working in the children's section, wanting to meet her somewhere "private". Ew, ew, ew.

4) Yell at the staff. Dude, I'm wearing an apron. And a nametag. Do I look like I'm in a position to make decisions about the amount of parking spaces in front of the building, to open a new store closer to you, or determine whether we should have a Biography section? Also, if you want access to every book ever written, get yerself onto Amazon. "Out of print" doesn't mean "its in the back in our magical stockroom of old books".

5) Make your payment options as complicated as possible. Bonus points if you can manage to use cash, credit, and a check for the same transaction!

6) Return books that were new when I was in middle school. Or books from another store. Or stolen merchandise.

7) Start a request with "I don't really remember anything about this book, but..."

8) Don't read any of the fine print on your coupon. Complain when I explain it to you.

Fellow retail veterans, feel free to add to the list!

Fox News, I'm Looking at YOU

2008-09-20T11:58:00.000-04:00

more music charts

NFL Week 3 Picks

2008-09-19T11:30:00.003-04:00

Amy in Ohio, my friend and fellow NFL-obsessed chica, has created a new way for me to waste time that I should be spending working or getting to know my family. Behold, my inaugural picks in the B(logger) F(ootball) L(eague). Click on the steenkin' badge to the right to connect to Instamom, where the magic happens each week. Winning teams are in BOLD. Because ya either go BOLD, or ya go home.

ARIZONA @ WASHINGTON (a: I hate the Redskins b: while I generally disagree with buying over-the-hill talent to compete, it seems to be working for AZ so far and c: I hate the Redskins)

CAROLINA @ MINNESOTA (The Vikes are a team that rivals the Browns in their inability to find a franchise QB. Sometimes a player is a low draft pick because he is not very good)

HOUSTON @ TENNESSEE (Not just because of the hurricane. Houston is just terrible.)

MIAMI @ NEW ENGLAND (blah blah Tom Brady, I know...but there's just too much talent in NE for them to lose this game)

OAKLAND @ BUFFALO (Does anyone really care about this game? Bueller?)

CINCINNATI @ NY GIANTS (Cinci gets to see Plaxico Burress again. Great)

KANSAS CITY @ ATLANTA (yawn. whatever. I used to enjoy watching Atlanta so I could bitch about how the media so badly over-hyped Michael Vick. Now...yawn)

TAMPA BAY @ CHICAGO (so that's where Brian Griese ended up)

ST LOUIS @ SEATTLE (Man, is Seattle looking terrible this year. I flipped a coin for this one)

DETROIT @ SAN FRANSISCO (I'd like to see Jon Kitna do well. What can I say, I'm a softie)

NEW ORLEANS @ DENVER (A pretty even match-up, but I'm giving it to the team who didn't have to stress about another hurricane last week)

PITTSBURGH @ PHILADELPHIA (Because I only pick Pittsburgh when I have money on the line and I have to. Otherwise, LOSE, SUCKA's)

CLEVELAND @ BALTIMORE (Because the Browns want to make us hope, before dashing our hearts on the rocks of their incompetence, yet again)

JACKSONVILLE @ INDIANAPOLIS (Every time I pick Jax, they blow it. When will this team finally live up to the hype? Oh right, when the find a better QB)

DALLAS @ GREEN BAY (I'm happy that Aaron Rodgers is playing well. I mean, he should be, after spending approximately 17 years holding a clipboard watching Brett Favre. But I can't see Dallas losing this one)

Monday Night Game

NY JETS @ SAN DIEGO (hmmm...a team that consistently loses in the final moments, against a QB legendary for last-minute hail mary victories?)

COMBINED FINAL SCORE____60_____

Seven Years Ago Today

2008-09-11T10:00:00.002-04:00

Seven years ago today, the weather was exactly how it is today. Sunny and warm, a beautiful fall day. When we first heard the news about the towers I was sitting in class - at first we thought it was a joke, then we thought some idiot had flown a Cessna into a tower by accident. By the end of class, we knew it was much, much worse. I tried to call my husband, tried to call my parents, tried to find out what was going on. Someone wheeled a TV into the atrium of the law school, and we all crowded around. I remember seeing news anchors fighting back tears. I remember hearing that the president had been killed, that another plane had hit the capitol, that they thought maybe 10,000 people were dead or missing. I remember standing in the law school wondering if it was safe to go home. I remember realizing how much the sense of safety was ingrained in me - how untouchable I felt, ensconced in a medium sized city in the middle of the safest country on earth. And suddenly: I wasn't. I remember thinking about places like Israel, Colombia, Congo and Beirut. That there were people who felt like this every day. And how much I - how much we all - had taken for granted.

Image courtesy of the Boise Picayune

The Blue Household by the Numbers

2008-09-10T20:55:00.002-04:00

Years of marriage: 7
Pets (current): 2
Addresses since marriage: 4
Martial Arts schools trained at: 3
Fights settled by sparring: 17
Trips to the emergency room: 8
Concussions suffered: 7
Jobs held: 12
Speeding tickets: 4
Wedding rings lost: 2 (Mr Blue)
Jimmy Buffett concerts attended:12
U2 concerts attended: 2
Pairs of acid-washed jeans owned: 3
Countries visited: 8
Completions of Around the World in 80 Beers: 2 (Stella)
Combined years of higher education: 17

News!

2008-08-30T10:32:00.003-04:00

First of all, sorry for the long stretch of no-posting. Things have been crazy busy around here. But hurray for three-day weekends! Here's what's been going on at the Blue household.

Lil'Blue moves up to the big girl room at daycare on Tuesday. *sniff* I have to buy her a little backpack to commemorate the occasion. I'm sure she'll pick the pinkest one they have at Target. Maybe we can bedazzle her name on it too.

I have an interview for that part-time gig at the law school! I've decided that I *really* want this job, so I'm taking the interview seriously (that isn't always the case for me...sometimes I go to interviews because its just nice to be wanted. But this one, I'm bringing the noise for.)

I've been in kind of a running funk lately - my longest run to date is 9 miles and since then, I've just felt sort of unmotivated. Plus, my right knee has been bothering me a lot and its just no fun to run in pain. But I have a 5K tomorrow that I'm looking forward to, so I think that'll help me get back into the swing of things. I've tried to run this race for the last four years, and something ALWAYS happens to make me back out (2005: dislocated hip 2006: bronchitis 2007: California) so this year, dammit, I'm going to run it! It takes place at the zoo so after the race Mr Blue and Lil Blue and I will go see the new giraffe exhibit. Yay! I've also decided to *very tentatively* pencil in the Akron Marathon for next year. It gives me 12 whole months to train, which ought to be more than enough. Mainly I just need to get this knee pain under control.

We spent last weekend visiting my hometown. It was Lil Blue's first time up there and she got to spend lots of quality time with her grandparents and meet some of her other aunties. We had a very nice time once we got there, but the 5-hour car ride was HELL. We ended up having to stop halfway during both trips and just kill time. I'm almost considering doing the trip in two days next time because I can't deal with the SCREAMING.

thanks to Feener at Mommyvents for helping me win my very first blog giveaway loot ever! yay!!

And extra-special thanks to all of you who commented on my last post. I wish I could give you all hugs IRL!!

Losing Myself

2008-08-24T10:24:00.005-04:00

It seems like lately everyone I know is on a weight-loss plan. They are my friends and I love them and I'm ecstatic to see them taking strides toward being happy and healthy. But I've mainly stayed out of the weight-loss talk, and here's why:

My name is Stella and I have an eating disorder.

It probably started when I was very young. From 4th to 8th grade I went to an arts school where I majored in ballet. I danced six days a week, twice a day on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. While I'm sure there are many ballet schools that teach little girls how to dance and stretch and wear tutus in a healthy way, mine was not one. (Case in point: a good friend of mine was 5'8" with an athletic build. Her ballet instructor told her that if she ever wanted to see the stage she needed to get under 100 lbs. She ate only one apple a day for a week. And I thought she was awesome for doing it).

I am by nature pretty muscular. When I exercise, I don't become lithe - I become strong. So ballet was a constant struggle to lose not only fat, but muscle. I'm not sure when I discovered purging as a weight-loss method, but by eighth grade I was doing it regularly. I would skip lunch or eat a plain salad with no dressing. I couldn't escape family dinners, so I worked out a complicated mathematical system where so many bites of food equaled so many minutes of running or biking. I joined the track team and swam laps. And eventually destroyed my knees and had to quit dancing. Ironically, that only made things worse. I started high school in a new school where I knew no one. Without dancing, I didn't know what to do with myself. I joined the track team and the debate team. Debating was fun but caused me a ton of stress, so I exerted control over my life the only way I could - by controlling what went in my mouth. Every meal I skipped, every pound lost, was a small triumph. I ate Dexatrim and caffeine pills like candy.

When I started college I was 5'5" and a size 2. But whatever god or goddess watches over lost young women decided enough was enough and by random chance I ended up rooming with the best possible roommates I could have had. I was at Miami University, a school notorious for its sky-high number of women treated for eating disorders. I could have very easily ended up with a roommate who, like me, thought the world revolved around the number on the scale. But instead I had my awesome roommate M, and our across-the-hall mates A & B. M & A were athletes and four of us instantly formed a tight bond that has lasted through the years. We ate at the dining hall together, went to the rec center together, and finally things started to come together for me. I had great friends, I was having more fun that I thought was possible, my classes were challenging and interesting. I put on 30 lbs and grew an inch. My sophomore year, I discovered martial arts. I stopped weighing myself. I started eating meat again, lifting weights regularly, and discovered that putting on muscle could be a good thing. I met Mr Blue, and the rest is history. Kind of.

I am firmly convinced that eating disorders, like alcoholism and other forms of addiction, are life-long conditions. I am in recovery, but I am not recovered. Every day I have some sort of unhealthy thought. I don't keep a scale in the house and I do my best to avoid the one at the gym. About five years ago I started running competitively - gradually running longer and longer races. I think that being on a training regiment appeals to the part of my brain that needs to control my body.

My biggest fear is that someday my daughter will ask me if she's fat. Our society bombards our girls and young women with unhealthy images and unattainable goals. When I hear about girls in elementary school that are dieting - even taking diet pills! - I am so afraid for Lil' Blue. Even now I try every day to give her some sort of positive message about food. I keep her in the kitchen with me while I cook, and eat snacks and dinner with her every day. We try new foods and say "yum yum!" I don't read or keep any magazines in the house if they have models or actresses or other absurdly skinny women. And most of all, I try to let her know that she is beautiful and valued and wonderful from the inside out. Because I don't ever want her to feel that her value rises and falls inversely to the number on a scale. And because of her, every day I have a new reason to value myself - because she deserves a mother who is happy and healthy.

Jack and Lily giveaway!

2008-08-18T15:24:00.002-04:00

Check out Now Entering Momville for a chance to win a free pair of Jack and Lily baby shoes. Ooohh...ahhhh....so cute!

Citius, Altius, Fortius.

2008-08-17T09:14:00.003-04:00

When anyone tells me I can't do anything, I'm just not listening any more. Florence Griffith Joyner (American athlete, 1988 Summer Olympics)

Congratulations to 41-year-old mom Dara Torres for winning two silver medals in Beijing. Torres had retired after giving birth to her daughter (now two) but decided to make a comeback in the Olympics. Another congratulations to 38-year-old mother of one Constantina Tomescu-Dita who blew away the competition to win the women's marathon. Both women were in the spotlight for being the oldest to medal in their respective sports. Other women athletes are making their mark in Beijing: 38-year-olds Kate Allen (triathalon) and Elaine Youngs (beach volleyball) are expected to perform well, and 36 year old WNBA superstar Lisa Leslie is competing in her fourth Olympics.

These women, and the many other "older" women competing in the Olympics, are proof that women's bodies can continue to perform at the highest levels for decades. Additionally, the number of female athletes who have resumed training after having children are inspiration for all of us who have been told that our bodies will "never be the same" after pregnancy and childbirth. While most of us will never be Olympians, we can all aim for our personal bests and push our bodies to the limit. Don't listen to anyone who tells you that you need to shelve your personal goals just because you've hit an arbitrary age, or given birth to a child. Dara Torres has said in interviews that she wants her daughter to know that a woman can do anything she puts her mind to. What a wonderful message for all children - to see their mothers continuing to strive, and continuing to improve their bodies, minds and spirits.

In other Olympics news, be on the lookout for cougars prowling the US mens' swimming events. Rawr!

In a Reflected Light

2008-08-13T21:04:00.004-04:00

We are the sun and the moon -
you the brightness of day, golden hair and peachy skin
all the colors of sunrise.
Me the darkening shadows of night,
the secret rustling of creatures, furtive and restless under moonlight.
You are the vibrant flowers, laughing carefree,
I am the silent leaves falling under black trunks.
You are the fresh start, the hope of day beginning -
I am the calm of evening, the quiet exhalation of day ending.
But oh, my sun...
I could not shine without your light

Beginnings

2008-08-13T18:32:00.001-04:00

Today I got started on the road to La Leche League leadership! I still need to apply and be approved, a process I'm told can take up to a year (during which I meet with local leaders and get lots and lots of training, while discussing my own views and personal breastfeeding experience).

All the News That's Fit to Blog

2008-08-12T11:07:00.002-04:00

Its been a busy few weeks around the Blue household. Lil' Blue came down with a case of roseola (seriously, its a real disease. I didn't believe it either. It sounds like something Oompa Loompas would catch. But in reality its no fun whatsoever) So we weathered that storm.

Half Marathon training is going well. On Sunday Mr Blue and I did an 8 mile run. My time is still pretty slow for the long runs - its definitely time to start incorporating intervals and speed work. Also? I discovered that almost-30 year old knees cannot be asked to pick up and run without adequate stretching and icing time. But, icing time = lazy TV time, so there's that.

The Blue house is undergoing some renovations. Its a nearly 100-year old Craftsman style home with lots of "potential", i.e. "hey we're getting a great deal on this place, all it needs is new paint/roof/deck/carpet/retaining walls/more paint/exterior and interior doors" We have a contractor (yet another!) coming to give us an estimate on rebuilding the craptastic DIY deck currently embarrassing the house. I had a near-meltdown when our front door lock spontaneously broke down (I didn't even know that could happen!) Of course this happened when I was outside, which necessitated a trip into the house via the dining room windows. As the lock was apparently melded permanently with the (also craptastic) front door, I was afraid we'd need a new door. But Mr Blue's handiness with a power drill, razor blade, and hammer enabled us to remove the lock and replace it. I've since decided to paint said craptastic door, which apparently in its former lives has been 1) bright green; 2) teal; and 3) purple. Yuck.

I applied for a job at my former law school. I don't want to spill the beans on which position it is, but it sounds like an awesome job, and one that would allow me to actually make a difference (for reals!) So my fingers are crossed!

Lil' Blue continues to amaze us with her new skills. Every day it seems like she has a new word or new thing she can do. And she walks almost like a regular person, as opposed to the drunken Donkey Kong style toddling she had been doing. Even though we've sacrificed much in terms of quality of life, I wouldn't have traded the past 14 months for anything. Watching her grow has been the most fun I've ever had. We're off to a local water park this afternoon, where Lil' Blue has discovered the wave pool. She likes to go deeper and deeper until the waves actually crest over her head. I apparently have a reckless adventurer like myself....hurray! And oh no!

Backwards and in High Heels

2008-08-09T11:16:00.003-04:00

I've been wanting to write this post for awhile...ever since I passed a road crew on my way to the market. It was the usual assortment of big guys and one woman. Who was wearing a pink hard hat. I thought about that pink hard hat for a long time, and wondered about the woman wearing it. About how she probably started working construction wearing the standard-issue yellow hard hat. She seemed to be a strong woman, she'd probably never really thought about being female. She worked hard, probably harder than the guys, just to be accepted. Construction was just a job. So when did she think to herself "I need a pink hard hat"?

You don't have to signal a social conscience by looking like a frump. Lace knickers won't hasten the holocaust, you can ban the bomb in a feather boa just as well as without, and a mild interest in the length of hemlines doesn't necessarily disqualify you from reading Das Kapital and agreeing with every word. ~Elizabeth Bibesco

I've always been the girl who hung with the guys. I wasn't a jock, necessarily, I just felt more comfortable in the company of men. Even as an adult, I tended toward activities where I was often the only woman. Boxing, flying...these are all still firmly in the man's world. I had never thought about being female. I had to work harder, hit harder, push myself farther, just to be accepted. But boxing and flying were just things to do. I was never particularly feminine until I was surrounded by men. It wasn't until I started flying that I started wearing pink. Something about all that masculine energy seemed to bring out the latent girlyness in me. And it's not just me. Did you know they make pink boxing gloves? They do, and I never saw a pair until I left the relatively gender-balanced world of Tae Kwon Do for the rough and ready Mixed Martial Arts arena. I've been lucky to meet a group of strong, independent women and I'm proud and thrilled to be their friend. While I'm still more likely to be watching the game with the guys then scrapbooking with the girls, I've managed to find a balance. Whereas when I was younger, I tried to be just like the guys, now I realize that I can enjoy those masculine things while still embracing what makes me uniquely feminine.

The little rift between the sexes is astonishingly widened by simply teaching one set of catchwords to the girls and another to the boys. ~Robert Louis Stevenson

And so I look at my daughter, who loves all things pink and sparkly, and hope that she doesn't lose what makes her sweet and feminine. I hope that she doesn't feel that she must make a tradeoff between feminity and respect. But I also watch her play with toy trucks and building blocks, and hope that she can feel comfortable and welcome playing with the boys. Because while little girls have spent too many years trapped in the pretend kitchen with the dolls, its just as limiting to feel that you must hide your feminine side to be accepted by the boys. Feminism isn't just about the freedom to box or fly or work construction. Its about being able to wear the pink boxing gloves and the pink hard hat if that's what you want.

If Only I Could Fly...

2008-08-05T19:44:00.001-04:00

A real post is coming soon...[spoiler alert! We'll be discussing feminism and dilemmas of raising daughters!]

Until then, I leave you with this graph, from the totally hysterical (but not in the feminine kind of way) Graph Jam

more graph humor and song chart memes

Resting on Lughnasadh

2008-07-30T21:37:00.000-04:00

In the Celtic world, tomorrow, August 1st is the festival of Lughnasadh. For those who celebrate the old holidays, Lughnasadh represents the end of summer and the beginning of harvest season. In Ireland, Lughnasadh takes its name from the Sun-god Lugh, who celebrated the first festival in honor of his foster-mother Tailtiu. Tailtiu, according to legend, died of exhaustion after clearing the entire island of Ireland so that it could be used for agriculture. Thus, Lughnasadh has strong and obvious connections to childbirth - the time when the child is "harvested", taken from the dark earth and brought into the light.

Beyond its celebration of the real act of harvesting, Lughnasadh offers a chance for us to reflect on the nature of giving and taking. Tailtiu gave until she literally died from exhaustion. All of us have areas of our life where the balance is shifted too far - where we give until we're exhausted and don't get anything back. Perhaps it is a job, a relationship, a friendship that simply asks too much. Mothers of young children know that they are incapable of returning the time and energy we put into them, although in their small way they enrich our lives beyond measure.

Any farmer knows that harvest is one of the busiest times. But when all her bounty has been collected, brought in and stored for the long winter, the earth rests. And so should we.

Star-Crossed?

2008-07-29T20:04:00.000-04:00

I couldn't resist this astrology report from Parents.com. They were eerily correct! Except for the part about Lil Blue and me being well put-together. And others being envious. But otherwise....correct!

See your mom and baby personality overview. Generally, here's what's in the stars for you and baby!

Mom

Libra

The Scales

Sept. 23-Oct. 22

Lucky you, Libra. You're likely the mom that all the other moms secretly wish they could be: You always look good, your baby is fashionably dressed, and the preschool teachers think you're the exemplary mom specimen. Libras are naturally charming and have excellent taste and an enviable ability to keep things running smoothly. And your pitch-perfect sense of diplomacy? It will come in handy time and again at school and on the playground.

Don't forget to lighten up a little, though -- remember that mess and occasional chaos are an inevitable part of life with a baby. It's not a reflection on your parenting skills if one day you just can't seem to coordinate your baby's shoes with her overalls. And when Cheerios get squished in between the car seats? Let it go, mama.

Baby

Gemini

The Twins

May 21-June 21

Your baby is blessed with a quick, engaged mind and needs constant stimulation. Read to her several times a day, and make sure you have lots of little objects (rattles, squishy toys) for her to play with. Satisfy her natural curiosity -- and fend off restlessness -- with pop-up toys, puppet shows, storytime at the library, and frequent field trips (such as to the supermarket or a fish store). A true chatterbox, your little one may be the first in her baby group to speak. Even if it sounds like gibberish, pay attention: In her mind, she always has something crucial to say.

Tooting my own Horn

2008-07-29T11:29:00.001-04:00

Last night Mr Blue and I set a new PR - 7 miles in exactly one hour! That works out to slightly over 8 and a half minute miles. Woo hoo!

Conversations With a One-Year-Old

2008-07-29T09:45:00.000-04:00

"Lil Blue, its time to change your diaper"
"Diiiiiiiii-pooooo?"
"Yes, your diaper. Come here, please"
"Diiiii-poo! Hi mama!!"
"Yes, hi! Now lets change your diaper"
"Ball?"
"No ball right now. Diaper"
"Doggie?"
"No doggies right now. Diaper"
"yum yum?"
"When you're finished. Then we'll have yum yums"
"YUM! YUMYUMYUMYUM!!!"
"In. A. Minute"
"Where are you going! Come back here you little streaker!"
[sounds of little feet running away. Laughter]
...
...

"Uh ohhhhhhh"
"Hang on. Mama will get the rag"

We're Livin' on the Air...

2008-07-26T20:11:00.000-04:00

Sorry for the terrible WKRP reference, I couldn't resist.

Today I got to meet some of the wonderful women from Cincinnati Women Bloggers. We had a great discussion and lots of laughs. I learned a lot from some of the more experienced bloggers, especially those who are recently returned from Ohio PodCamp and BlogHer. I think we're really building a great community here in Cincinnati, and during the meeting I found myself getting incredibly excited by the possibilities. There is some overlap with this group and some local groups that are working to promote Cincinnati as a business and tourism destination - what if we could harness our combined voices and energy to really create a city that embraces technology in all its facets! That got me thinking about the other things going on in Cincinnati that only want for greater exposure. We have the Fringe Festival and MidPoint Music Festival that bring in artists from all over the world. It seems like every weekend I hear about someone or some group doing some kind of creative, exciting event. We have groups doing amazing good like Give Back Cincinnati. We have so many groups working to make Cincinnati greener, more progressive and more inclusive that when I tried to link to them all I gave myself a wrist cramp! We have so many voices with so much to offer. If we could just get everyone organized, we'd be moving forward so quickly that we'd be unstoppable.

Ricki Lake: Home Birth Ambassador

2008-07-22T10:46:00.000-04:00

Apparently Ricki Lake's documentary The Business of Being Born has been influencing some celebrities to consider un-medicated, midwife-assisted homebirth. According to People Magazine, Boxer Laila Ali is planning to give birth to her first child at home.

While I didn't end up having Lil Blue at home, I am a staunch advocate of womens' right to choose that option, and I would recommend that anyone who is interested in homebirth check out The Business of Being Born. Its an absolutely stunning, well-crafted, powerful look at modern birth options in America. I had a successful natural birth in a hospital (and all in all, a great experience) but far too many women end up being pressured into unnecessary and potentially dangerous medical interventions, including C-sections.

Every woman deserves the opportunity to choose for herself where to give birth, and under what circumstances. Medical interventions should be a choice made by the woman in consultation with her physician. Unfortunately, too often interventions are presented as "hospital policy", or necessary even for normal births. My own physician pressured me incessantly to be induced on my due date, despite no evidence whatsoever that my body wasn't progressing normally. I went into labor on my own at exactly 41 weeks, and had an uneventful labor and birth. Lil Blue was born healthy, on her own schedule. While things worked out fine for us, I had to put on my "game face" entirely too much during my last month of pregnancy while I argued with a doctor who was telling me that waiting even one day past my due date would endanger my child. Even though every credible medical source that I researched on my own indicated that due dates are really only "best guesses" and that absent a medical reason to induce at 40 weeks, a healthy mother should be able to go as much as two full weeks past her due date before an induction should be considered.

Another resource for anyone interested in birth options is The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. Henci Goer is up-front about her bias in favor of natural birth, but she does an excellent job presenting all of the facts surrounding medications, inducements and C-sections.

There's What in my Strawberries?

2008-07-21T11:01:00.000-04:00

There's no question that buying organic food has benefits for your health and for the environment. Unfortunately, for those of us who are not billionaires, a wholly-organic diet is out of reach. So how do you make the choice to buy organic or conventional? For the Blue family, our finances often make the decision easy - if we can barely afford to buy any food that week, then its conventional or nothing. But when we're farther in the black, I try to buy organic as much as possible, especially for the foods that Lil Blue loves, like cheese and snack foods. Today Gramma Blue (aka my mom) sent me this handy guide to the relative load of pesticides in each food. Its printable so you can take it with you to the grocery store to help you decide if that 200% price difference is worth it.

I also highly recommend this book. Burke goes into detail about the process of becoming a certified organic farm, and explains the benefits of buying locally as opposed to certified organic food from a large national or international agri-business. Its a quick read and contains helpful lists at the end that can be photocopied and kept as resources. Her book is available on Amazon but of course you should purchase it at your local independent bookstore.

There are issues beyond your personal health that factor into the organic vs conventional debate. While it may not be strictly necessary from a cost/benefit point of view to buy the lower-pesticide load veggies, buying organic still supports smaller, more earth-friendly farms, and helps reduce the overall amount of chemicals put into the air, ground, and water. So naturally, buying everything organic (or at least locally) is the ultimate goal.

But you have to start somewhere, and this list and Cindy Burke's book do a good job helping the average consumer make baby steps toward healthier, more responsible food buying.

Weekend News Roundup

2008-07-19T11:04:00.000-04:00

Our trip to California went brilliantly! After three cross-country flights with a babe under one, I've learned the following:

Always fly direct. Layovers only increase the risk of some sort of disaster.
Check your car seat. Knock on wood, ours has never been lost, and we haven't had to deal with carrying it through the airport.
Leave early in the morning. Yes, it sucks to be up and out at the crack of dawn, but you'll be grateful when you reach your destination and still have time to settle in and get the baby down at a decent hour. She'll be exhausted because she probably didn't nap all day, and by going to bed at her normal time, she'll be back to a regular schedule that much sooner.
Fly first class. Its worth every penny. Shorter check-in lines, bigger seats, your own bathroom, free food...free DRINKS....Worth. It.
Make a list of things you want to do at your destination. Cut it in half. Cut it in half again. Now you have a realistic goal of things to do.

Today we are going to our one-year childbirth class reunion. It blows my mind that all of our babies have turned one. It really seems like we were all doing our relaxation breathing and learning about our pelvic floor muscles, like, last week. Unbelievable.

I had my first unsubscription from the new mom's yahoo group I moderate. (Its a private group for my friends and invited friends-of-friends, so don't go looking for us!) But that makes it even sadder that someone would unsubscribe, especially without any warning or any explanation. I emailed J to see what's up and to tell her that we'd miss her and hoped she still wanted to hang out sometimes, but I haven't heard back. I'm sad to think that either something in her life has happened, or (worse) that something happened within the group to make her feel unwelcome. I guess some frienships come with an expiration date, but it still makes me sad because I like her.

I met Tito Ortiz at work last month. Nicest. Guy. Ever. I'm serious! He took the time to talk and personalize every person's book and memorabilia, and even stayed later to make sure everyone got a chance to meet and get their stuff signed. He took pictures with the staff, and was incredibly gracious. Here's a guy who has had a lot of success and never forgotten where he came from. You could tell he sincerely appreciated his fans, and his fans return that love a thousandfold. I'm already a huge UFC and MMA fan, but now I'll be sure to root extra hard for the Huntington Beach Bad Boy.

I've been working a lot lately, when it rains it pours, as they say. But all that means extra money for us, so yay!

The state of Ohio apparently doesn't want me to pay my yearly registration dues, and they're letting me know that by making it impossible for me to find a site to pay them online. Or even to check and see when they're due. This is an issue for me, because I don't work in an office so theres always a chance of a dues notice getting lost. So any Ohio attorneys who have paid your dues online, drop me a line and enlighten me.

Shut Up, Teddy Grahams

2008-07-18T09:51:00.001-04:00

This morning while I was eating a handful of Teddy Grahams for breakfast I took a look at the back of the box. There is a "recipe" for "PB&J Man!!" From what I can tell from the picture, I'm supposed to 1) cut a piece of bread into the shape of an (un-anatomically correct) man; 2) smear the head with peanut butter; 3) smear the body with jam (heh heh); and 4) stud his "clothes" with teddy grahams. Because....really? I have the time to "create" with food? Because Lil Blue will actually eat any of that stuff anyway? Lately the only thing she'll eat is goldfish crackers, and only if she can walk around in a circle with one fish in each hand. Because that's how she is.

I know I shouldn't let stuff like this bother me, but its been a rough couple of days. Yesterday Lil Blue and I had a playdate at our friend's pool. It was going to be us, and two of our friends and their little boys. Normally LB seems happy when we go swimming. But yesterday we were at the pool for less than an hour, while LB whined and cried and grabbed at me and hit and scratched at me, and generally threw a fit. She then screamed at top volume the entire ride home after I packed her up from the pool. This has been happening so much that I'm at the end of my rope. Nothing makes her happy. She hates me, hates everyone we know, hates everywhere we go and everything we do. Apparently the only place she's content is her three days a week at daycare, and then only if no one comes near her or touches her. When she was a newborn we called her colicky. Then she became "high needs" and lately "very sensitive" or "very spirited". But all those euphemisms don't make me feel any less like a failure. Shouldn't a child want to be with her mom? Shouldn't I be able to make her happy? What am I doing wrong? Did I screw up by not making PB&J man? Is that what it takes? Should I just give up, go back to work and let her be at daycare fulltime?

Things Left Undone

2008-07-14T17:49:00.000-04:00

This is the year I turn 30. The big day is still a few months off, but I've started thinking about things that I've started and not finished. I have a tendency to veer off into new activities as soon as the going gets tough - or boring - leaving a wash of unfinished tasks behind me. Here is a list of things I haven't finished, but hope to.

1. Finish getting my pilot's license. I logged around 30 hours in flight school several years ago. I'm many solo hours and one checkride away from being a fully licensed pilot. I quit because I had run out of money and time. I was preparing for my first bar exam and just couldn't find the big blocks of uninterrupted time you need to really work on flying. When I was flying, the average cost to achieve a private pilot's license was $6,000. Minimum. And that was for a motivated student who had the time to fly several times a week. Now that the cost of fuel has nearly doubled, I can't even imagine what it would cost to rent even the tiny thing I flew (that would be a Cessna 152)(it looked just like the one in the picture)

2. Get my black belt. This one was more about running out of time than money. I had two belts to go when a perfect storm of law school applications, wedding planning and relocation pelted me all at once. Mr Blue (a third degree black belt) technically could train me all the way to my first degree, although he's said that he would have me do my black belt test with an independent examiner so there is no question of impropriety and I could have my belt registered officially in Korea. We've talked about me starting my training again, but it'll take a lot of time when we are both free and rested. Ha! HA HA!

3. Improve my language ability. At different points in my life I was nearly fluent in French and Spanish. Both have degraded terribly over the years. I'd love to knock the rust off. I'm slowly working my way through a Spanish review workbook - I also have several friends from Mexico who have offered lots of free conversation. This year I vow to get over my insecurity and take them up on it!

4. Run a half marathon. I wanted to do one before Lil Blue turned one, but that didn't happen. I'm scheduled to run a half on my birthday in September.

I hate having so much unfinished business gnawing at me. Hopefully as Lil Blue gets older I can start working on these things - I want to look back in another 30 years and not wonder how things would have been different, if I'd only gotten up off my ass and worked on them.

TV Shows you should be watching but probably aren't

2008-07-10T13:51:00.001-04:00

If you haven't been watching Burn Notice, you totally should. Mr Blue discovered this hour long awesomeness buried away on the USA Network. Season Two starts tonight at 10 EST. BE THERE! If you need to get caught up, check out the episode guides here. And while you're there, browse around the website because Television Without Pity rocks.

Next up, Reaper. Another awesome show hidden on a crap "network". CW, per usual, has absolutely no idea how to market or promote a fabulous show but yet Reaper rules in spite of CW's ineptitude.

Happy Shimmies!

2008-07-09T15:46:00.000-04:00

You haven't heard me talk much about bellydancing lately, and here's why: the monthly cost of classes, in addition to the gas I would burn to drive the 20 minutes or so to get there has led me to go on yet another hiatus. I was totally bummed until I discovered that I can dance at home for free, courtesy of Fit TV's series Shimmy. Overall, I was pretty impressed with the series. The camera work is beautiful, if a tad dramatic. (Bellydancing in the snow? Really?) The series seems to be devoted to more traditional style than I am used to. With the exception of my very first introduction to bellydance, I train exclusively in tribal style. Tomato, tomahto.

My only gripe (you knew there would be one) is that the videos move very quickly. If you are new to bellydancing, you'd best have a DVR and practice with remote in hand, otherwise you'll very quickly get lost. Also (and this I'm sure is due to each episode only being 30 minutes long) the moves are shown, but not broken down or explained. So I fear that beginners will not develop very good technique. If you really want to learn to bellydance and you don't have access to a bellydance school, I would recommend picking up an instructional video.

For your viewing pleasure, here is a video of one of the foremost tribal style bellydancers, and my girlcrush, Rachel Brice.

Obama: June 30th Speech on Patriotism

2008-07-07T10:42:00.000-04:00

Finally, someone who gets it...

Summer Staff Picks Two - We're Turning Japanese!

2008-07-04T16:26:00.000-04:00

Putumayo Kids Presents Asian Dreamland: World music snobs love to hate on Putumayo in the same way that foodies love to hate on Rachel Ray. There are some surface similarities - both produce copious quantities of cheerfully repetitive product, heavy on comfortable favorites that require little heavy lifting by the consumer. But I openly admit to enjoying Putumayo's CD's precisely because they don't require heavy lifting. I can certainly spend hours diving into iTune's World Music library and discovering obscure artists. But certain types of music (especially Asian music) are so difficult to access by the average Western listener that it helps to have Putumayo do the work for you, by presenting ten or fifteen interesting examples of the given musical theme. Asiam Dreamland is in heavy rotation in our house as soothing naptime music, but it would be just as suitable for big people to relax to.

Sujata Massey Girl in a Box: This is the 9th book in Sujata Massey's fabulous series about young Japanese-American antiques dealer turned amateur detective Rei Shimura. Each book in the series is wonderful, and if you're new to the series I would recommend starting with the first book, The Salaryman's Wife. Its not essential to read the series in order, but it will help you keep the secondary characters and their roles in Rei's life straight. While Rei is American-born, each book takes place in Japan. You will learn a great deal about Japanese culture and society, and enjoy quick-moving action and suspense at the same time.

K i ri n Ichiba n lager: One of my favorites. A light, bright lager that isn't too hoppy or carbonated. In my opinion, one of the most refreshing beers for summertime or along with spicy food. I always drink Kirin with sushi because it doesn't overpower the delicate flavors of the food, and doesn't sit heavily in my stomach.

I want to believe

2008-07-02T10:12:00.000-04:00

It's bad enough that my last fill-up cost me $52. And that my last trip to Kroger topped out at $225. But now the fading economy has really hit me where it hurts. Today NPR Marketplace reported in passing that beer prices are rising due to higher prices for key ingredients like wheat, barley and hops. An MSNBC article from May explains that smaller microbrewers are in even more dire straits because they can't absorb higher costs or negotiate lower prices like big brewers. I feel no shame when I admit I am a beer snob. When I'm out and about, you're likely to find me blathering on about hoppiness and clarity and grapefruit-y undertones. Its just what I like.

Reason Magazine takes the debate to the next level by claiming the rising prices are are a result of greater demand for biofuels. Its not a new argument, and I don't deny the logic behind the proposition that prices for food staples are higher across the board due to a combination of agriculture subsidies and more land being turned over to biofuel production instead of food production. Growth of corn for ethanol production is highly subsidized in the United States and Europe, giving farmers a huge incentive to switch crops. Therefore, the supply of foodcrops is not stable, but in fact shrinking, excerbating the strain caused by supply vs demand.

It is true that some production methods for biofuels can result in a greater release of carbon into the environment than the amount released by a comparable quantity of fossil fuels. Reason, being a conservative publication, concludes that the solution involves abandoing biofuels altogether, and also smacking "the greens" in the mouth. However, the Science article that Reason cites explains that what is actually important is the location of the biofuel production, and the methods used to produce it. The authors of the article were comparing biofuel production in clear-cut areas in rainforests, savannahs, etc., versus the use of perennial biofuel crops in low-value or abandoned agricultural lands. The increased carbon release from biofuel production is a result of the clearcutting of the land on which it is grown, not a flaw inherent in biofuel production. What does not seem to be seriously up for debate is that use of biofuels can reduce the amount of fossil fuel consumption world-wide, lowering the amount of greenhouse gasses in the atmosphere and hopefully slowing global climate change.

The truth, however, may wind up being more inconvenient that Al Gore anticipated. The truth is that as a middle-class American, I can afford to care about climate change. Sure, I may be paying more for beer, but I can afford to want to leave a cleaner environment for my children. And while I and other middle-class Americans are demanding more research into biofuels, mothers in Haiti, Bangladesh and Africa are daily enduring riots, desperately paying more than 75% of their income to buy rice and grain to keep their children alive. The truth is that there is a divide between the First and Thirld World that is deep and growing deeper every day, with no clear solution in sight. In 2007, Barack Obama stated "I believe [climate change is] one of the greatest moral challenges of our generation". He plans to invest $150 million over 10 years into biofuels, including second-generation biofuels that may help to arrest the ethanol-corn growth that has resulted in skyrocketing food prices. Obama's campaign advocates change we can believe in. And I want to believe. I want to believe that I don't have to mortgage my children and grandchildren's future to fulfill a moral obligation in the present. I don't know if his plan will work. But I know we have to try.

RIP George Carlin

2008-06-27T19:04:00.000-04:00

I know I'm late on this one...in my defense, I was on vacation (more on that later) But in honor of the dearly departed George Carlin, a couple of my favorite clips. I hope ol' George is cracking jokes with Buddy Jesus in heaven. (Obviously these aren't safe for work, so watch yerself)

Baseball vs Football:

White People

One year ago today

2008-06-21T11:56:00.000-04:00

One year ago today we met for the first time. "Open your eyes!!!" our doula told me. When I did, there you were. Pale and bewildered, they placed you on my chest. We blinked at each other. "Now what?" we both thought. We brought you back to our room - you were so impossibly tiny! Your daddy and I struggled to put on your nightgown. Looking back, I realize we put it on backwards. Putting clothes on you is still a struggle - you much prefer running around in the buff! In those first hours and days we learned about each other. You learned that those voices you had been hearing could walk around and that mommy and daddy would hold you tight and not let you fall. We learned that you loved music and hated being too hot. We both tried our hardest to learn to nurse. For the first few weeks of your life we fed you from a syringe because you wouldn't suck. Then one night, a switch flipped and you suddenly understood what you were supposed to do. Now, one year later, you are still nursing and I cherish every minute we spend together at the breast. You still love music. I bought you a toy piano for your first birthday and you crawl over to it and bang away with your gigantic, beautiful smile. You also love anything that makes a rhythm - so in your toy box are shakers, rattles and tambourines. Right now your favorite toy is an empty box. You push it around your room filling it up with toys. Then you push it to the other end of the room and take the toys out. Sometimes you like to get in and I spin you around or push you around the room. You are such a joy for your father and I. We love to sit and watch you play. Sometime we watch you sleep because you are so beautiful and we can't get enough. Parenting you has been harder than I ever imagined, but loving you has been so much easier. Happy birthday, little one. I love you.

Organic Weed Killer Giveaway!

2008-06-17T13:52:00.000-04:00

Visit the Crunchy Domestic Goddess for a chance to win a bottle of Nature's Avenger organic weed killer. While you're there, check out her archives for lots of good, green advice!

Success!

2008-06-16T21:22:00.001-04:00

Lil' Blue's birthday party went off without a hitch. Bubbles were blown, cupcakes were consumed, no major meltdowns occurred (from her or me) We couldn't have had a nicer day at the park. Now....to focus on getting ready for our trip to California this week!

Quick Update

2008-06-12T19:18:00.000-04:00

New post coming soon...I've been in first birthday party mode around here!

Also, my keyboard took a bath in some limeade (thanks for that Lil Blue) so typing on it sucks until I clean it off.

Not a whole lot of news around these parts. LB and I went to a La Leche League meeting this week. I used to be a regular, then quit going after I got sick in January and had to supplement with formula. I know, I know...I am making a much bigger deal about it than I should. Under the circumstances, it was formula or nothing since LB was not really eating solids at the time and we were out of frozen milk. I know that. But no one ever said mommy guilt was rational. Luckily my milk supply came back, we are still happily nursing, and I have gotten over my totally irrational feelings of failure. I've started going to LLL meetings again, because if I ever want to achieve my goal of becoming a lactation consultant I need to reconnect with LLL. I'm particularly interested in starting a Peer Counseling program to work with women in communities that traditionally have lower rates of breastfeeding - particularly inner-city and low-income women. Additionally, Southwest Ohio and Northern Kentucky have a large (and rapidly growing) Latino population. My dream job would be to work with these women and encourage breastfeeding in their communities, either under the auspices of LLL or as an independent lactation consultant.

Summer Staff Picks - June

2008-06-04T12:57:00.000-04:00

Sacred Games by Vikram Chandra is long, I won't lie to you. But believe me when I tell you that I rocked my way through this one with record time, because I couldn't put it down. Vikram Chandra has created a compelling mystery set against the background of modern day Bombay

Midival Punditz - Bhangra Fever Bhangra music is popular in the Indian region of Punjab. Also check out this single recorded with Jay-Z. Listen carefully for the Knight Rider theme!

Finally, a little something to drink. Christian Moerlein, one of the original breweries in the Cincinnati area, is best known outside of this area for getting 70's-era frat boys drunk on Hudepohl. But the brewery has reinvented itself and now produces some high-quality brews. I recommend the OTR Ale - the closest beer Moerlein produces to a true IPA.

So Where's My Corner Office?

2008-06-03T21:25:00.001-04:00

I guess I've been on a kick with the personality tests lately:

Your type is: entj —The “Executive” Mother

“My mind is always going. How can I fine-tune the system to everyone’s advantage?”

Competent and confident in a management role, the ENTJ mother organizes the needs and schedules of family members into a workable family system. Within the system, she provides her children with care-taking, direction, and limits, but she also gives them space to develop their own self-sufficiency and judgment.
Analytical and adept at problem-solving, the ENTJ mother listens to her children’s concerns empathetically and then strategizes with them how to improve the situation—either by intervening on their behalf or backing off to let them solve problems on their own. She particularly enjoys watching them take responsibility and accomplish something they find important on their own.
Intense and insightful, the ENTJ mother is cued in to her children’s intellectual and emotional development. She uses her quickness and communication skills to talk things through and help her children connect with people and better understand life.

Get Yer Fringe On

2008-06-02T20:33:00.000-04:00

If you are in the Cincinnati area, you have five more days to catch the Cincinnati Fringe Festival. I caught a production of Undertow on Friday night and had a blast. Plus, with all the new bars and restaurants lining the 12th & Vine Street area, you can make a night of it!

I

Truthiness and nothing but the truthiness

2008-06-02T14:49:00.000-04:00

Truthiness: (noun)

1 : "truth that comes from the gut, not books" (Stephen Colbert, Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report," October 2005)
2 : "the quality of preferring concepts or facts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts or facts known to be true" (American Dialect Society, January 2006)

Today I listened to Terry Gross interview Scott McClellan, former Bush press secretary, possible robot, and author of What Happened, his soon-to-be released book about his time in Washington. McClellan is certainly not the first former Bush insider to pen a tell-all book. In fact, it seems to be de rigeur for former members of his administration to beat a hasty retreat right to the doors of the major publishing houses. Its almost like People magazine for political geeks.

McClellan portrays himself as a young, naive, decent guy sucked into the maelstrom of Washington, D.C., where he worked "16 hour days" in the "White House bubble", unaware of public opinion or criticism of the administration. It is true that McClellan had little experience when he came to Washington. In fact, his major accomplishment pre-press secretary appointment appears to be his term as president of Sigma Phi Epsilon at the University of Texas. While he stopped short of actually claiming he was told to lie to the press, he hinted that had been the case, and certainly left the impression that his job was less about conveying information to the press, and more about maintaining his talking points in the face of the occasionally blistering questioning from the press corps. Which anyone who ever watched him deliver a "briefing" already suspected, but I digress.

Now, my opinion of Bush administration politicos ranges from dim, mealy-mouthed douchebag (McClellan) to conniving backstabbing opportunist (Karl Rove) to OMG, now I know what happened to Scorpius! (Dick Cheney) Post-interview, my opinion of McClellan is that he is a dim, lying, mealy-mouthed douchebag.

What got me was this: when asked if he had read the other books written by former Bush administration employees, McClellan's response was basically "I didn't read them because I knew they would conflict with my talking points". In other words, he knew when the books came out that former insiders were saying things that differed from what he was fed by the administration. Sorry Scotty, but that makes you a liar. The only way that comment makes sense is if he knew at the time that his talking points were false. Because if he trusted that his talking points were true, then what difference did it make what the books said? The only way it becomes a problem is if his talking points were lies, the books were true, and the press corps asked him to explain the discrepancy. Deliberately avoiding reading the books was the only way to avoid having to answer the question altogether.

So to sum up: McClellan is still obfuscating, still mealy-mouthed, and still sticking to his talking points. The only change is the source of his information.

My negative personality traits - let me show you them

2008-05-31T14:58:00.001-04:00

Eysenck's Test Results

Extraversion (81%) high which suggests you are overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense too often of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.
Neuroticism (60%) moderately high which suggests you are worrying, insecure, emotional, and anxious.
Psychoticism (65%) moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly selfish, uncooperative, and difficult at the expense of the well being of others

Take Eysenck Personality Test (similar to EPQ-R)
personality tests by similarminds.com

Main type	Variant

Take Free Enneagram Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

ENTJ - "Field Marshall". The basic driving force and need is to lead. Tend to seek a position of responsibility and enjoys being an executive. 1.8% of total population.

Take Free Jung Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Free coffee!!

2008-05-29T17:11:00.000-04:00

My friend Amy is hosting a giveaway at her wonderful blog Amy In Ohio. Check it out! You can win stuff!

You can also read about a scandal involving Rachael Ray. No, unfortunately (or fortunately) its not more kinky stuff with her husband. This time, Rachael has apparently given aid and comfort to the enemy by wearing a scarf. On TV. In an ad for Dunkin freakin' Donuts. I can't believe I haven't heard of this before now. I bet it was on NPR, but my ears, in a desperate attempt to save my brain from THE STUPID, heroically clenched shut and prevented me from hearing the story. Good lord. Can you imagine Rachael Ray as a member of a terrorist cell? She'd be all "Hi guys! Whatcha doin? Did you notice my fabu new scarf? Today I'm making C4!! The recipe is so super-duper easy!!" Then the other terrorists would shoot her in the face to STOP THE TALKING.

Greater Cincinnati PKU Walk-A-Thon

2008-05-29T08:39:00.000-04:00

If you are looking for something to do this Saturday, please check out the Greater Cincinnati PKU Walk-A-Thon. My friend S's son has PKU, so I've gotten a small glimpse at how this rare but very serious disorder can affect the entire family. More research into a cure is desperately needed, but research can't happen without public support and lots and lots of money.

For more info click here

WALK FOR PKU RESEARCH SPONSORED BY THE MID-ATLANTIC CONNECTION FOR PKU AND ALLIED DISORDERS, INC.

a portion of the proceeds will be donated to Ohio PKU Camp and the MACPAD Fund

3rd Annual State of Ohio PKU Walk-a-thon

When: Saturday, May 31st, 2008
Where: Miami Whitewater Forest $2.00 Park Admittance Fee
(Harrison Pike, Off I-74, Dry Fork Exit)
Schedule:

9:00 am to 10:00 am Check in & turn in donations, a T-shirt will be given to
any walker that is present with a donation of at least $25.00, one shirt per walker please

10:00 am to 10:15 am Speaker, Raymond C. Stevens, Ph.D.
Stevens Lab from The Scripps Research Institute in LaJolla, CA

10:15 am to 11:00 am Walk for Awareness & Research

11:00 am to ? Social Gathering, Caricature Artist, Cotton Candy.
Feel free to bring your favorite PKU recipes to sample/share, low protein snacks and water will be provided. Have PKU food that is not being used? Let’s swap…bring it.

11:30 am PKU Group Photo

GOING TO LUNCH?
The Indian Creek Tavern
6206 Main Street, Oxford, Ohio 45056
(directions will be provided at walk, it’s 16 miles from walk, between Oxford and Ross)

PKU pizza donated by Cambrooke, while supplies last.

Tavern has large fenced in area, cornhole, etc.

A prize will be given to the family who brings the most pop tabs. Our MACPAD group will be donating them to Cincinnati’s Ronald McDonald House

Come spend your morning meeting and socializing with other PKU families. Brings chairs and umbrella’s if needed. The park has two easy paved trails. One trail is 1.20 miles & the other is 7.80 miles. Feel free to bring your bikes or roller blades!

More information about the Walk can be found on the MACPAD website, www.macpad.org

A quick rundown....

2008-05-29T08:23:00.001-04:00

phew! It's been a busy few days! I can't even remember what was going on when I blogged last, so here's a quick recap of my weekend:

On Saturday my lovely neighbor P invited me to spend a day of pampering with her and her friends (all new moms). We rented a limo and generally spent 8 hours living like high rollers. I've always been kind of a dirty hippie but I have to admit, I enjoyed it. We went shopping, got (fabulous!) haircuts and drank lots of drinks. From cups with flowers on them. Did I mention I got a Fabulous! Haircut! Indeed I did.

Sunday was a playdate/get together with moms from our childbirth class. Most of us keep in touch by email but since a lot of the playdates are weekday shindigs, and several of the moms work full time, we decided to get together on a weekend. It was a really nice time, and one I needed to lift some gloomy spirits I've been having off and on. Here's the deal. Right after the birth of our babes last summer, our class was really tight. I guess that was the "camelot" phase, followed by the inevitable drifting apart. Lately there has been tension between some of the moms, and there have been some comments back and forth to which I've unfortunately and unwillingly been a party. I think it stems from the whole SAHM/WOHM tension (Hate!!) But on Sunday everybody got along great so I was happy.

Monday Mr Blue and I ran a 5K with Lil Blue in the jogging stroller. It was perfect weather and a really nice course. The jogging stroller screwed with my time, though, so I guess I need to train more with her instead of waiting until mornings when she's at daycare. It does *not* help, BTW, when you're already running hard, to have a tiny toddler face look at you like "Run faster, Mom! This is fun!!"

The house is really quiet right now. LB is on her way to daycare (thanks daddy!) Usually on Thursdays I have work to do, but I wrapped up a couple projects earlier this week so there's nothing. I have a feeling I might get something by email but so far I've got nothing on the plate. Which is good, because the weather's going to be nice so I could use this time to do some desperately needed yardwork!

A real post is coming, I swear. Just a teaser: we'll be discussing my plans to become a lactation consultant!

Miscellany

2008-05-22T12:11:00.000-04:00

Mr Blue was offered a chance to take over a children's martial arts school. He is a very accomplished martial artist who hasn't had an outlet for his skills in a very long time, so its an opportunity to get back, albeit as an instructor/administrator and not a student. It would mean one weeknight and one weekend day in Oxford, which isn't necessarily a bad thing in my book. I would love a chance to tag along on Sundays - Oxford is home to our alma mater and full of good memories (and good restaurants!) Mr Blue and I actually met in a martial arts club while at Miami, so I'm hoping that when she gets older, LB could also participate in the club. I want martial arts to always be a part of our family. Another not-inconsequential benefit would be the extra $5000 we would be getting from the club! So we'll see how that goes. We're going up on Sunday to check it out.

I've had a couple triumphs on eBay of late - I scored a Lucky Jeans skirt and a pair of 7 for all mankind jeans, both for under $30. Also, a totally cute little Cleveland Indians tracksuit for LB. Yay internets!

Preparations are beginning for our next trek to the west coast. We've already traveled with LB (once to San Diego, once to Phoenix) so I think we're at least prepared for the ride. Although I need to get out and buy the stash of surprise, very special toys (despite which LB will fuss until we let her play with Do Not Touch items like cell phones, iPods and tiny bottles of vodka. No wait, that's me playing with the vodka, my bad) This time around we're heading to Los Angeles, where I haven't been for almost 20 years. Maybe its changed some. While we're there we'll be attending a family friend's Very. Fancy. Party. At the Bel Air Country Club, I shit you not. Even LB will be in attendance. I thought about splurging on a new dress, then remembered the gorgeous tea-length black dress I wore for my friend A's wedding. Yay! And thanks, A, for picking such awesome bridesmaids' dresses!

Today has been spent on some necessary but sucky spring cleaning activities, including cleaning the jute rug currently splayed over our dining room floor. This particular rug has seen better days, as our dog decided to act out his sibling rivalry all over it on several occasions. I previously tried Bac-Out, which works great as a laundry freshener, not so much as a serious carpet cleaner. So this time around I'm trying a combo of Oxy-Clean spray and powdered Oxy clean with a scrub brush. Oxy-Clean spray is nothing short of miraculous for laundry, so hopefully its powers extend to rugs.

Todays forecast: cloudy with a chance of running

2008-05-19T21:47:00.000-04:00

If you want to run, run a mile. If you want to experience a different life, run a marathon.
Emil Zatopek

Today I forced myself to get back on the running wagon. Not the other wagon, that would suck. In fact, tonight's post is brought to you by Murphy's Stout (its whats for dinner!) Anyway, back to the story. As you know if you've been hanging out here lately, I have been sick. With the SARS. Or TB. Or something. But today I decided enough was enough, strapped LB into the jogging stroller, and ventured out. We did a very short run, just long enough for me to feel loose and warmed up.

I don't run because I enjoy it. I have had the occasional runner's high, and there are certainly times when I finish a run glad to have done it. What I really enjoy are running races. I'm competitive by nature, and races distill competition down to its base elements. Run faster than the person in front of you. There's no equipment, there are no teammates, its just you, faster or slower. I had originally planned on running the Country Music Half Marathon on April but backed out due to LB's continuing ear problems and non-sleeping. I just couldn't train the way I needed to. So I've penciled in the State to State Half Marathon in September (on my 30th birthday, in fact). I have yet to start my training program but I think today proved that its at least within the realm of possibility. The pneumonia hasn't beaten me yet!

The Half Marathon will be my longest race ever. I have a few 10K's and many 5K's under my belt, but 13.1 is a big goal for me. Until recently, I'd denied any interest in running a full marathon. I am a runner, its true - but marathoners are a different breed. If you can train for a half, you can train for a full - but you really have to want it. And I didn't. Until now. Lately I just can't get the idea out of my head. Every car I see with a 26.2 sticker makes me ponder whether I have it in me to do 26.2. Thousands of people do it every year...why not me? But first I have to survive a half. I'll update on my progress, because nothing helps you train like exposing yourself to public shame.

Things that have actually come out of my mouth

2008-05-18T14:24:00.000-04:00

Since becoming a mother, I've heard things that I never, ever thought would exit my mouth. Things like the following:

"Sweetie, please don't stick your fingers in the dog's butt"
"Quit licking the floor"
"Honey, get a towel! She's leaking!"
"If you want to go to the zoo, you have to wear pants"
"Quit running away, I need to look in your shorts"

Practice made perfect

2008-05-15T19:24:00.000-04:00

“Discourage litigation. Persuade your neighbors to compromise whenever you can. As a peacemaker the lawyer has superior opportunity of being a good man. There will still be business enough.” (Abraham Lincoln)

Last night Mr Blue and I had this conversation:

"So what, if anything, did you actually like about practicing law?"
"well I...."
"Don't say the paycheck"
"dammit, okay, other than the paycheck..."

I had to think about it for awhile. For one thing, the paycheck wasn't that hot. For another, when I left my job I was burned out and miserable for reasons not entirely due to just work, and I think that attitude might have colored my perceptions. But its been nearly a year since I left full-time practice so I took some time to reflect. Most of my work involved banks. This was the beginning of the end for the housing bubble, and here in the Midwest, cracks were starting to show. Much of my work ended up being foreclosures or litigation involving foreclosures. What I say is that I couldn't live with the thought of taking peoples houses - although a large part of my work was commercial property, so really, I wasn't taking a lot of houses - but the truth is less grand.

At the outset of my career, I held a simplistic view of both life and litigation. In life, I believed, there always exists a moral high ground. Surely, I thought, litigation would reflect this bipartite division between greed and altruism, corruption and transparency, good and evil. Reality, I discovered, is most often gray, dirty, and relative. I realized that the mortgage holders had, if not outright lied, at least misrepresented themselves on their mortgage applications. Many had never made a payment, ever. Most lied to my face, dodged service, and one even picked up and moved in the middle of the night. The ones who weren't scammers or freeloaders were slum lords, who were using their property to extort money from the truly downtrodden and innocent who had no other options. Being confronted with my naivete, tearing down my visions of a world divided into black-hat capitalist and hardworking proletariat, burned me out. It was too difficult to maintain a sense of optimism, much easier to fall back on cynicism. I didn't want to look at all mortgage holders in crisis as deadbeats, cheats and scammers. I wanted to believe that some people were deserving of mercy.

So....I guess I never really answered Mr Blue's question. I liked the academics of practicing law. I'll hang out in a library doing research and writing briefs for days if I could. But I guess I don't have the stomach for litigation. Or maybe its that I have a heart that created the problem.

In which I journey to my personal hell

2008-05-14T15:13:00.000-04:00

Just got back from the grocery store. Lets review. First of all, you should know that I *hate* grocery shopping. I will fake illness, injury, even my own death, to get out of going. I'll shop at, and even enjoy, farmer's markets and health food stores *to a point* but the monthly Kroger shopping binge? HATE. Why did I have to go today, you may ask? As anyone who's ever tried to shop with an almost-11 month old knows, its a huge pain in the ass. But last night Mr. Blue went on a rant about how "nothing is getting done around the house" due to your's truly's laziness, lethargy and generally shiftless attitude toward domesticity. So in a fit of pique, I decided I would do the grocery shopping today, all by myself, and spend up our monthly budget so that if he wants stuff like cookies or whatever, tough. So off went LB and I to the grocery store, PO'd and hungry. Which anyone knows is a bad idea. Kroger however, bless their self-promoting, capitalist heart, was giving away samples of cheese by the door. The fakey orange big-people cheese satisfied and amused LB for most of the trip. She actually did pretty darn well, if I do say so myself. No major meltdowns at all. It got a little dicey going through the baby food aisle (she was grabbing for bottles and shouting "NUM!" When she couldn't hook a bottle, she grabbed at my shirt and wanted to nurse) Another positive? My cheap ass self saved $26 using coupons! Woo hoo! That more than paid for the chocolate graham crackers I got myself. Have you tried these things? delish. I'm halfway to a S'more without even trying.

OMG its blue!

2008-05-13T09:38:00.001-04:00

I'm experimenting with a new template. Oooooh Ahhhhhh. Boy do I wish I knew some HTML so that I could customize this bitch, but sadly I do not.

Book Nerdiness

2008-05-13T09:31:00.000-04:00

So for some reason I've had more time to read lately. Its been totally awesome. I'm currently reading Smile When You're Lying which is an absolutely hysterical (if R-rated...don't say I didn't warn you!) selection of travel writing that, according to the author, he wasn't permitted to actually publish by his employers. Read it for his take on the Caribbean alone.

I've also picked up several awesome ARC's (that would be Advance Reader's Copies) at work. As an aside, let me just say that getting ARC's is one of the huge highlights of being a bookseller. Publishers will drop off boxes and boxes of all the books that are being published in the next year. They want us to read things in advance of publication so that we're knowledgeable and ready to recommend them when they hit the store. Occasionally I grab a stinker, but lately I've been batting 1,000. Rachel Kushner, y'all. Remember that name in July, 2008. You heard it here first!

Outbreak status: contained

2008-05-12T12:44:00.001-04:00

well it looks like I've survived the SARS that descended upon our house for the last two weeks. I'm still croupy and a tad stuffed up, but I'm no longer looking longingly at the train tracks and contemplating ending it all. Since I'm still breastfeeding, the best drugs are off limits to me, and poor weak little Sudafeds weren't really getting it done, so I sent Mr Blue to the likker store for some Jamesons. Cure's what ails ya! No seriously, I think that was what helped me turn the bend. Warm whiskey, a crapton of honey.....yum.

The worst part of Outbreak 2008 was the inevitable coughing, hacking fit that would strike juuuuuuuust as LB was starting to fall asleep at the boob. Without fail. While it was probably a combination of stress, no sleep, time spent at doctors offices in preparation for LB's ear tubes, no sleep, and sleepless nights, I'm placing the blame on LB (aka the plague monkey). That girl brings more shit home from daycare than you would believe. The tail end of the epidemic was pink eye. Yes! Just like in college! That sucked ASS because I hate wearing glasses. I bought the coolest pair I could find and I still look like Clark Kent. Suck. Plus, it meant I couldn't volunteer at the Appalachian Festival like I wanted to do because, contagious! As it turns out, the weather was pretty shitty this weekend anyway so maybe it was a mixed blessing. So now I'm embarking on my post-illness cleaning spree to try and send a message to any remaining germies still behind enemy lines.

the weird world of mama friends

2008-04-30T19:46:00.000-04:00

I've been very blessed to have many "mama friends". Most of us met in childbirth class and remained friends (for more than a year now!) They are each wonderful, cool chicks that I'm happy to know. While we all come from very different backgrounds, we share an interest in natural parenting and a disdain for the yuppie moms we see around town. We support each other and provide a very necessary outlet when mothering becomes too much, as it does at times. Our group has expanded throughout the year to embrace friends and friends-of-friends who have babies, and now a sizable group of us get together for playdates and fun with our babies. But lately I've been realizing that we don't really *know* each other. By meeting the way we did, and spending time only with each other's kids, we've each taken on a new, generic "MOM" profile and somehow lost our individuality. Some moms have even drifted away from the group. I miss them... but.... do I? Did I even know them? Did they know me? Does anyone know me now? Sometimes I feel like I am just a veneer. A cocoon made of threads of my old self, strands wrapped around an amorphous core of MOM.

Educational adventures

2008-04-29T20:50:00.000-04:00

We (that is, I) have decided that we want Lil Blue to have a Montessori education. Luckily, Cincinnati is unique in that we have multiple public Montessori schools, and even a Montessori High School. I've been reading this book which is what the Cinci Montessori Society recommends for the 0-3 year old crowd. Its very interesting, although I wasn't aware that Montessori had so many...rules. Yikes. With the different mobiles at different ages and the special beds and the blah blah blah. Luckily Lil Blue seems to enjoy Waldorf and Montessori type toys (I mean "materials") so I've been kind of doing my part. For instance, she has a wooden play cookware set that she enjoys chewing on and throwing down the steps.

I agree with most of the Montessori philosophy, and I think Lil Blue will definitely benefit from a program that allows her to focus on her interests. She's shown already that she has a strong will but becomes very focused on things that interest her (such as dogs, certain puzzle pieces from her "shapes" puzzle, and DOGS). I can't say that I fall completely in line - sometimes I feel like the Montessori approach (at least as laid out by these authors) wants to force a child to become independent instead of creating an environment in which the child naturally achieves independence at her own pace.

Of course, one could argue that attachment parenting and Montessori are fundamentally opposed in many ways. I think that it is possible to reconcile the two, but my blended AP/Montessori approach probably would get me kicked out of both camps. At its heart, Montessori is trying to create an educational system that respects children, albeit as little proto-adults. AP also wants to respect the child, but doesn't offer much in the way of advice for how to help the child achieve independence (AP seems to say only that if you parent this way, the child will ultimately become an independent adult. But....how?) So, hopefully we'll muddle through and give Lil Blue both an excellent education and a strong, attached foundation to her parents.

Oh, and in case there was any doubt that I'm raising a little Princess...at my work we have a bunch of different posters propped up on the floor. Today Lil Blue crawled over to one with a pink fairytale castle on it and started patting it and laughing. She even tried to kiss the unicorns. Then she wanted to buy a pair of shiny pink shoes (she pointed and made her "gimme" hand gesture) So much for my kid that I thought I could go camping with! Instead I'll have the kid that wants to wear a tutu to the grocery store.

Bits N Pieces

2008-04-14T14:34:00.000-04:00

First, medical stuff...

I am over my (fourth) case of mastitis. I think I am getting quicker at catching them so I don't have as much of the flu symptoms. Sucks. Moving on..

Lil Blue does not have sleep apnea! At least, the doctor says that she doesn't have any restrictions in her airway. She does, however, have fluid backing into her ears which resulted in an infection. She HATES the medicine. I've had more success giving meds to a cat.

In other news....

I am almost finished reading Into the Wild. I had put off reading this book because I thought it might make me crazy in the way that reading Kerouac does. And in fact it did. I'm currently dealing with my insanity and wanderlust by bouncing around the thought of a camping trip to Smoky Mt NP. More to come on this topic in a later post.

I only have one more week at the bookstore before I go "oncall". Meaning I'll be available to cover shifts or busy days but not working a set schedule. This is bad news for our finances, but good news for my general mental health.

I am attempting to become fiscally responsible by clipping coupons and shopping sales. Unfortunately, most of the stuff that goes on sale around here tends to be stuff we don't use or need, like conventional cleaning products, soda and junk food, or personal care items. But I'm trying! Our CSA share starts next month and I CAN'T WAIT!!

March Product Highlight - Born Free Sippy Cups

2008-03-31T10:40:00.000-04:00

If you run in crunchier circles, you're bound to eventually hear about the controversy surrounding the use of Bisphenol-A in baby products. There are plenty of websites better able to fill you in on the potential dangers of this chemical that is found primarily in clear plastics - my goal is only to promote one BPA free product that I've found. Lil Blue has four of the training cups, and we love them. They are a perfect size to give her enough water without being too terribly heavy. Leaking is non-existent. The handles are easily grippable by tiny hands. The inner valve is easy to manipulate and does a good job regulating flow. Most importantly, the bottles are made of a completely BPA-free type of plastic. So far they're holding up well to constant tossing from high chair to hardwood floor.

I'm eagerly awaiting my kleen kanteen sippy bottle. I'll let you know how that works for us!

For more info on BPA and BPA-free sippy cups, click here

Parrothead Blues

2008-03-31T10:34:00.001-04:00

So for the first time in my adult life, I don't have Jimmy Buffett tickets. Not because I couldn't beg, borrow or steal them...because I didn't buy them. Why? Because I just don't have the energy to coordinate the evening with the military precision it would take to get me, Mr Blue and Lil Blue there at the same time.

All the fun things I thought I'd do with my kid just seem like way too much work. I still muster some enthusiasm for art projects and playdates, but it just feels like I'm creatively tapped out right now. Luckily I live in a city that seems to have an abundance of cool, non-commercial activities for young-uns facilitated by younger, better rested, and more creative people than myself.

Oh, but I'll probably still tailgate the Buffett concert. I'm not that lame, yet.

All-One! All-One!

2008-03-15T11:15:00.001-04:00

I'm happy to report that I'm still loving my Dr Bronner's soap. I really believe that it works best with a foaming pump, however. I bought five off of eBay and replaced all of my hand soap dispensers, and put one in the shower. Fabulous! I'm slowly replacing my body wash, face soap and shaving gel and just using diluted Dr. B's. I also cleaned my floors with a diluted mixture of Mrs Meyer's and a couple squirts of Dr. B's. It cleaned my ceramic tile kitchen floor as well as my hardwood! Maybe those hippies were right after all...this stuff is pretty much perfect! Plus its saving me tons of money that I would have been spending on other soapy products - the fact that you can dilute it so much means a little bit goes a long way. My current favorite scent is Almond but come summer time I'm planning on switching to Lavender. YUM!

Superbowl Musings

2008-02-04T10:28:00.000-05:00

Holy shit...check out the Giants! I have to admit that I wasn't enthused about this game. I can't stand the Patriots. I have nothing against the individual players (Randy "I play when I feel like it" Moss excepted) but as an organization they annoy the crap out of me. And it starts with the coach. As a life-long Browns fan, I hold a special grudge against a supposed "coaching genius" who did nothing for my team and bailed on us as soon as he could. Then to build a team with a culture of arrogance and a win-at-all-costs attitude, while selling the fans on the vision of a bunch of scrappy upstarts and regular joes. Humble pie...yeah right. Ask the Redskins about the Patriot's humble pie. The Redskins may not be my favorite organization either, but they came away from that game wearing humble pie like they were the Stooges. Belichick is the kind of guy who will lie, cheat, steal and have his defense cream the handicapped kid running in the feel-good TD.

That being said, as a Midwesterner it is my right, privilege and obligation to hate all New York sports teams and root for their downfall at every opportunity. I figured this game to be another lackluster Superbowl where the outcome was decided pretty much by the (overly long, boring) halftime show. Well, so much for that! I can't remember the last Superbowl that had me on the edge of the coach, holding my breath. It was probably the Rams-Patriots Superbowl, which one could argue was basically the same game with the Patriots in the roll of the underdog. Had I known it was going to be such a good game, I would have tried harder to get out of working. At least I got to see most of the second half.

The commercials sure sucked too. Yikes.

I Don't Think This is What Ben Franklin had in Mind

2008-01-30T16:24:00.000-05:00

Today I had to go to the Post Office to mail some Christmas presents (I know, I know...) I take the boxes up to the counter and they charge me my money. Then we have this dialogue:

Me: Can you guarantee this will arrive undamaged?
PO: No
Me: Can you guarantee that it will arrive on time?
PO: No
Me: Can you guarantee that it will arrive....at all?
PO: No, all those things cost extra
Me: So, this money I'm paying...its for what exactly?
PO: We take it back to the back

January Highlight - Dr Bronner's Peppermint Soap

2008-01-23T21:36:00.000-05:00

I finally tried Dr Bronner's Soap. Hippies are always raving about this stuff, so I was skeptical. Hippies recommending soap is much like supermodels recommending candy bars - take it with a grain of salt. I'm happy to report that this stuff lives up to the hype. It smells delicious and cleans well. And a little will last you forever because you dilute it like crazy. One complaint - its very, very liquid-y. I'm thinking I need to find myself a foaming soap pump to really appreciate this soap. You can get it at normal places like drugstore.com, but I recommend at least checking out the website - its like a cyberheadshop. With soap. Hmmmmmm.....

Shimmy On, You Crazy Diamond

2008-01-23T21:34:00.000-05:00

So far, so good on resolution #3 - I've made it to my bellydancing class twice in a row! I didn't realize how badly I'd missed dancing until I went back.

Down On Me

2008-01-23T20:31:00.000-05:00

Today's just one of those days... you know, where you feel like your friends don't like you, your house is small and messy, and every other blog seems wittier and more interesting than yours? You know? So to help me break out of my funk, here's a list of random things in my life that make me happy.

Lil Blue. I love that her favorite thing in the whole wide world is the Grinch. I love that today at the bookstore she made out with the giant stuffed Grinch for so long that I finally pulled her away because I was kinda embarrassed.

My dog. He rules.

My newest soap.

Dark chocolate covered almonds from Whole Foods. YUM!

My husband, natch. He puts up with a lot of shit from me.

Fresh Racket

2008-01-22T17:23:00.000-05:00

So I was hanging out with Lil' Blue today and we both started getting a little restless. At first I thought of going to our local kid's bookstore but we've been hanging out there a lot recently and I was feeling like something new. Also, I needed to hit a deli. I figure Mr. Blue will be more likely to watch Lil' Blue tonight so that I can go to bellydancing if there's a sandwich somewhere in the house. So off we went to our local Fresh Market. I never go there - I think I've been once in the last year, even though its close by. Once I got there I remembered why I never go. However, in the interests of fairness, there are definitely some positives about the place.

Negatives
The prices! Holy crap, y'all. Two bucks for a pound of conventional green peppers? No way. And you have to admit its ballsy to be selling regular ol' chewing gum for more than a buck when you share a parking lot with a CVS.

The whole "we started out as a little veggie stand in California" vibe they're trying to cultivate. Pull the other one, Fresh Market - you're owned by Kroger. You're about as old school, down-on-the-boardwalk as Hollister

Positives
I like that they empty your cart for you. When you've got a seven month old in a sling, not having to do it yourself saves time and backache

They do carry a fine selection of high-end organic products. While I am too cheap to buy any of said products, its always nice to know they're there, just in case

They carry the full line of Mrs Meyer's cleaning products. You hear that, Wild Oats? All the products.

All in all, I spent $50 on nothing that I need. Well, that Mrs Meyers scrubby stuff will be useful, and I am enjoying the tasty carrot souffle that I picked up at the deli. And I suppose it might have tired out Lil Blue somewhat, and that's always the number one goal.

Did I say every day?

2008-01-22T17:22:00.000-05:00

sorry. I guess the every day thing isn't quite working out....my excuse is that I've started doing some freelance work which is turning out to be more time consuming than I thought. Here's hoping I can post a little more regularly!

Game On!!

2008-01-07T12:58:00.000-05:00

So much for my plan to write for five minutes a day, every day, beginning January 1st. But I beg your patience...I suffered from the stomach flu from hell for most of the first week in January, and I didn't think you'd really want updated on that. Also, I felt like ass and watching words appear on the computer screen made me dizzy. But I have no more excuses. Now, to get those damn links up!

Guilty Pleasures (holiday edition)

2007-12-18T08:17:00.000-05:00

1. Band Aid - "Do They Know It's Christmas"
2. Ramones - "Merry Christmas (I Don't Want to Fight Tonight)"
3. "How the Grinch Stole Christmas"
4. Jimmy Buffett "Christmas Island"
5. Saying "have a nice day" to the militant "Merry Christmas"-ers. They don't quite know what to do with this one....they're loaded for bear if you say "Happy Holidays" though.

Bah Humbug

2007-12-13T17:33:00.000-05:00

What the hell, people? I work the cash register. I don't know you. If your feet hurt or you didn't get that Christmas bonus, it's not my fault. If your team lost, your wife yelled at you or your kids don't visit enough - not my fault. If you thought we had a book and we don't - not my fault. The weather's yucky, parking is bad, and the price of gas is high? Not. My. Fault. So don't take it out on me....please?

The First Five Minutes

2007-12-10T09:32:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Five Minutes a Day, where I commit to posting every day, for five minutes. Its like a garage sale in my brain...sometimes you find a diamond in the rough, but mostly its just a lot of someone else's crap.