Reaching Out and Touching Someone. Or Twenty.

Monday, October 6, 2008

My little sister (hi, B!) finally convinced me to join Facebook...and now I'm wondering where the last 24 hours disappeared to. You see, I switched schools several times growing up, including between junior high and high school. And back in those dark ages, we didn't have email, cell phones, text messaging, twitter, facebook, et cetera, to use to keep in touch. We picked up the phone (which sometimes, at least in my house, had a dial) and called each other. Well, I hate talking on the phone. Did then, do now, always have. So many of my friendships dwindled away to nothing. Kids I sat with on the bus, ate lunch with, told secrets to and passed notes to, all went their separate ways. Until NOW when I can sit at my kitchen table and chat away with people I haven't seen for years. We even found my "little sister" from the family who hosted me during my homestay in France!

Finding one friend in particular has been wonderful. We'll call him M. Back in our school days, a lot of the kids would call M gay, I guess because he was soft spoken and liked art. Although, it was an art school, so all of us probably seemed gay to kids at regular school. But I digress. I'm pretty sure the other kids made M's life hell in school, but he was always a good friend to me and always had a huge smile on his face. Since high school he's moved to a city he adores and has a fabulous job that brings him lots of satisfaction. And I am so, so happy for him. He was my friend and I was always nice to him. But I wasn't brave enough to stand up for him when other kids said hateful things. Maybe he is actually gay. Maybe he's not. That's not the point. The point is that those kids were assholes, and I should have done more for my friend.

My sincerest desire is that Lil Blue won't be that kid. That she won't be any of those kids - not the mean girl, not the picked-on kid, and not the kid standing quietly by. I can only hope that her father and I do a good a job molding her into a person who is both kind and courageous.

Posted by oballard at 6:45 PM  
Headless Mom said...

Kind and courageous-lofty goals but as one who recognizes the importance it should be easy.

October 6, 2008 at 9:03 PM  
sweetpea85 said...

it's funny, sometimes i find myself wondering too what happened to your friends! let me know what everyone's up to!

October 7, 2008 at 10:16 AM  
~m said...

I think everyone had a friend like that.
It always makes me cringe, the knowledge of all the potential cruelty that kids can inflict on each other and that my little guy may and/or will have to face it someday. Seems like unless you are the uber-popular (which I never was) you come in for it at some point.
And I also cringe to think that my little guy could be capable of inflicting that kind of cruelty.
Here's hoping that the concerted efforts of in-touch parents will ameliorate the baser instincts in our little ones! :)

October 11, 2008 at 12:42 PM  

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